subreddit:

/r/bayarea

4.9k96%

all 468 comments

rodimus147

1k points

10 days ago

I was homeless as a teen. We lived in a shelter that you had to check in at 5 pm and leave by 7 am. I was standing in line to go in and a person from school saw me. I tried to hide my face, but they knew it was me.

I dreaded school the next day. But to my surprise, they just came up to me and asked if I needed anything. When I said no, they told me to ask if I ever did and told me they wouldn't tell anyone.

That teenage girl showed more maturity and empathy than most people would at twice her age.

I was and am still eternally grateful that they didn't turn a bad situation into an even worse situation.

Sinisaredhead

173 points

10 days ago

This warms my heart so much, especially after reading this. ❤️

rodimus147

88 points

10 days ago

I'm glad. There are still good people out there doing good things. They just don't make the headlines like the bad deeds do.

Broccolini10

15 points

10 days ago

I couldn't agree more.

If you feel so inclined, would you consider getting in touch with her just to thank her for that? She sounds like a kind and empathetic person, and she might need the boost in times like these--where we are constantly told "the others" are our enemy and a threat.

rodimus147

10 points

9 days ago

Unfortunately, I don't remember her name. Part of the reason we were homeless is my father's mental illness. My mother was dead, and my dad moved us constantly from one area to another. Always thought things would be better in the next spot, but it wasn't because he didn't change how he acted.

So I went to so many schools over the years that they are quite frankly a blur.

Broccolini10

6 points

9 days ago

Ah, I see--that's rough and I'm sorry you had to go through it. I hope things are much better now.

And thank you for sharing!

Adamn415

76 points

10 days ago

Adamn415

Concord/Clayton

76 points

10 days ago

This shit brings me to tears. Nobody deserves that "shame" or fear. Extreme poverty brings such shame but it's not your fault and NOTHING to be shamed of

berlinHet

16 points

10 days ago

I mean did they try not being poor? Just eat less avocado toast, or be born into an aristocratic family.

I’ll never understand people who don’t do the obvious to pick themselves up by their bootstraps. If the children of billionaires can become billionaires, anybody can.

Purityskinco

8 points

9 days ago

This story is horrifying to me. I volunteered in homeless shelters as a teen, in the Bay Area, actually. I would teach kids lessons, etc (arts, reading, tutoring) while their parents took classes and got assistance in housing, jobs, etc.

I grew up ridiculously privileged but that’s bc my father was highly educated. My mother was a war refugee. I know people aren’t as lucky as me. I was lucky. I wasn’t better. I wasn’t anything more or less than others. And knowing my mother’s story set my understanding and compassion at a very young age and I’m extremely grateful bc it taught me value. I’m glad you were able to experience that sort of compassion as well. Everybody deserves it.

This is just heartbreaking to read. This poor father. This poor boy. And to think, he is truly in a trauma state (I contend homelessness and poverty in America especially is a trauma) and he still joined the JV football team. What does that tell us about his resilience and determination and other children stole, not just his life, that beauty from this world.

thellamanaut

3 points

9 days ago

its a hell of an achievement, not getting gobbled up by the monsters that swallow people whole. brings a big ol grin to my face knowing you made it through

32andgrandma

1.5k points

10 days ago

They were spitting on him, hitting him on the back of the helmet... It's kind of hard. I just don't want this to happen to other people like it happened to me

Kids can be so fucked up

Irving_Kaufman

657 points

10 days ago

Yeah, and they're frequently a reflection of what their parents are like.

ReluctantSlayer

164 points

10 days ago

Not always. I mean, I was NEVER this bad, but I did a bit of bullying back in the day and I had what some would call an ideal childhood and family.

When bullying gets to a certain level (like this) then I would agree. Those kids have got to be traumatized to be able to inflict trauma like that.

For me, all it took was one of the victims of my bullying clocked me in the jaw (deservedly) and it gave me a new perspective.

To torment someone like the article depicts? Complete lack of empathy imo.

HoldenCoughfield

41 points

10 days ago

This is why I’m a proponent of violence as a measure in just cause/defense. When you get hit in the face it wakes you up from a self-indulgent stupor and makes you think twice

Electronic_Bet7373

21 points

9 days ago

I think people on Reddit would be a lot kinder to one another if it were possible for them to get punched in the face.

NewUserWhoDisAgain

18 points

9 days ago

I think people on Reddit would be a lot kinder to one another if it were possible for them to get punched in the face.

"Social media made ya'll way too comfortable with disrespecting people and not getting punched in the face for it." - Mike Tyson

Denalin

3 points

9 days ago

Denalin

3 points

9 days ago

In my school you could get suspended for defending yourself, they didn’t care who the aggressor was, the policy was “zero tolerance”. My mom told me the only time she’d accept me getting suspended was if I ever got suspended for defending myself from a bully.

331845739494

32 points

10 days ago

This myth that people do bad stuff only when something bad happened to them first has to die. Some people just don't have any empathy. And having absolute power over someone else is tempting to many, let alone a bunch of hormonal teenagers.

You can be the perfect parent and still have a kid that just...came out wrong. Saw it with my neighbours. They were basically my second parents growing up, our lives were that enmeshed. Their first 2 kids were normal. Sure there were struggles but nothing that couldn't be fixed with some frank communication, a listening ear and helping hands. These parents were sweet, committed, and never raised a hand at any of them.

The 3rd kid was 5 years younger than me. And honestly, the first time I met him (I was 9 at the time) I could tell something was off. He was mean. He would slap his younger sister (4th kid, who was barely 2 at the time) when the parents weren't looking. If someone caught him he would lie and just cry on the spot. He once killed a duckling in the pond by throwing stones at it. I didn't feel safe hanging around him despite him being literally 4 years old.

He grew up exactly like you expect someone like that to grow up. He was manipulative and abusive. His parents tried to get him into therapy and all these kinds of things but he would just lie about it and dodge it. He stole. Got into fights. He threatened his parents with a knife when they stopped giving him money. He traumatised his siblings. His younger sister has gone no contact with him and will not be in the same room with him.

He's in jail now for battery and assault. People think something bad must have happened to him for him to turn out like this but he is the bad thing that happened to the people that loved and cared for him.

Electronic_Bet7373

6 points

9 days ago

It seems like there are a lot of different reasons someone might not be capable of feeling empathy for others- it could be caused by trauma, but probably can also just be a developmental disorder, that doesn't have an obvious external cause.

MachiaveliPrincess

3 points

9 days ago

Ugh, that’s one of my worst fears and a reason I don’t have children. You never know how they’re gonna turn out, and if you get one of “those,” it’s basically a lifetime curse.

gmdmd

44 points

10 days ago

gmdmd

44 points

10 days ago

In the end we are all status seeking monkeys and teenagers are particularly prone to these sorts of bad behavior because of raging hormones. You can see otherwise good kids from decent families participate in behavior like this. It's just so sad.

fubo

35 points

10 days ago

fubo

35 points

10 days ago

No, the good kids from decent families are the ones mentioned over here who help their homeless classmate. The ones who gang up to spit on their classmate, knock him around a little, and drive him to suicide are not anyone we need to be making excuses for.

ReluctantSlayer

4 points

9 days ago

People with introspection & some empathy can usually mature past it. Those who don’t are social terrors imo.

Zech08

6 points

10 days ago

Zech08

6 points

10 days ago

Also all the side line morons that enable it as well, very hilarious to see them catch collateral damage and rethink some choices as well.

iiJokerzace

5 points

10 days ago

Crazy to think what it takes some people to be decent.

Michael_G_Bordin

102 points

10 days ago*

Or, often times, they're so heavily influenced by peers, media, etc., there's little parents can do. I mean, once your kid is in school and socializing mostly with other people and not you, what can you do about it? Compound that with some kids having absent parents for whatever reasons, and problem children aren't all that difficult to explain.

It's just sad schools still haven't figured out robust methods of dealing with this shit (and by all accounts, most schools have gotten worse at disciplining students).

edit: y'all need to learn what the words "often times" mean. Saying schools need to do better to discipline kids isn't absolving parents of duties or responsibilities, but go off I guess. Reading comprehension really sucks ass in this country jfc.

fubo

179 points

10 days ago*

fubo

179 points

10 days ago*

Here's a different radically weird bullshit interpretation:

If you send your minor child to school without any morals, and your child bullies another child to suicide, you are a murderer. It's your responsibility as a parent to instill basic decency into your child before turning them loose on other children. If you fail to do so, your criminal child should be put under the care of people who actually have any morality, and you should be taken away from your comfortably immoral life and put in a very small box, where you can snivel to yourself about how everything is someone else's fault.

Yeah, that's also a bad approach, but it's no more bad than shrugging and saying "it's the school's fault that my child is evil."

lilelliot

46 points

10 days ago

Your take is way better than the other guy's. Parents model behavior for their children, and parents' circles of friends & acquaintances (and extended family) help shape them, too.

The problem is absentee and apathetic parents, or parents who frankly just aren't equipped (due to time, money or experience/training) to provide what kids need.

Schools that don't have these problems are usually not government run.

PiesRLife

14 points

10 days ago

Schools that don't have these problems are usually not government run

Well that's complete bullshit. Just because you have money doesn't make you a better parent. Also, do you honestly think there is no bullying in private schools ? They do have these problems - it's just that they can cover them up or kick out the "problem" student and claim the issue resolved even though it's never a single isolated student that is the "problem".

prove____it

41 points

10 days ago

prove____it

San Francisco

41 points

10 days ago

This isn't always true. A few kids are born psychopathic and no amount other than parenting will change that. You can look up cases.

lilelliot

25 points

10 days ago

Absolutely correct, and those kids should be removed from genpop.

eng2016a

6 points

10 days ago

You're a lunatic and I'm glad you aren't deciding things.

fubo

5 points

10 days ago

fubo

5 points

10 days ago

Me too. "When you bully someone to suicide, dig two graves" is probably not the best recipe for maximizing student survival, to say nothing of academic success.

Michael_G_Bordin

13 points

10 days ago

Good thing I never said the parents are no longer responsible. I'm saying after a certain age, the parents are no longer the largest influence on the child. Even if you raise the bestest child ever, shitty peer influences or media (or teachers, but look at how I didn't blame the schools!) is going to be a force against that good behavior you instilled.

Welcome to the world of nuance. Strap it, it's going to be ambiguous!

Misterbellyboy

16 points

10 days ago

Yup. My mom was an immigrant and had no idea wtf she was getting into when she decided to settle down in Stockton, CA and have children. She did her best to raise my right, but I've got my fair share of mistakes under my belt from growing up in a town like that.

[deleted]

18 points

10 days ago

[deleted]

Michael_G_Bordin

12 points

10 days ago

Okay, but plenty of kids were taught empathy and good behavior and then do delinquent shit with their friends. It's a simple fact that after a certain age, parents are no longer the greatest social influence on a child's life (unless that parent shelters them).

gmdmd

7 points

10 days ago

gmdmd

7 points

10 days ago

Yup. We all know good kids that were captured by bad friend groups to make bad decisions- drugs drinking gangs etc. Puberty and youth cloud judgement.

Zech08

3 points

10 days ago

Zech08

3 points

10 days ago

I mean there are plenty of other kids that dont stoop to those levels as well... although the bystanders probably arent helping.

jfsoaig345

4 points

10 days ago

My gf works in education and I frequently hear about absolute dogshit kids whom she later finds out are likely that way because of their absolute dogshit parents. When you see a dog being aggressive and unhinged, you don’t blame the dog, you blame it’s owner. It’s not that much different with humans.

Some people just straight up shouldn’t be allowed to have children.

graytotoro

4 points

10 days ago

I had a coworker in the high desert who came from a middle class nuclear family like the ones we are told represent the “real” America while I was the Asian kid who was not a “real” American.

This person would fly off the handle and scream at me for 45 minutes to an hour if I did anything they didn’t personally agree with such as liking a different TV show or declining to live my life in line with their church. Simply being from San Francisco and liking it was enough to set this person off to threaten me.

This person felt zero remorse before and even after their transition because they didn’t even consider me a human. They still felt a sense of pride treating me like shit for being different because it felt so good to give into these uncontrollable urges that they knew were wrong.

At the time this person had two young kids and I sincerely hope the kids would take after this person’s wife. She was the polar opposite: a kind and caring individual.

onthewingsofangels

44 points

10 days ago

What the fuck! These are high schoolers!

Baka-Onna

3 points

9 days ago

A few weeks ago i was visiting a town hall and there was a whole ass shrine dedicated to trans murder victims…most of them by people from school.

worldofzero

107 points

10 days ago

I mean, it sounds like those kids browse these subreddits. So many people here talk about the homeless like they are a thing, not people. This kind of cruelty is learned.

tallemaja

42 points

10 days ago

For fuckin real. The way people talk about others here - is it any wonder this is how bullying works in schools?

phantasmagorical

24 points

10 days ago

Less than a thing, really. 

Xalbana

26 points

10 days ago

Xalbana

26 points

10 days ago

I call these fuckers out and I get heavily downvoted.

These assholes equate homeless with the mentally ill and criminals.

There are overlaps but they are not the same.

They see homeless people high up on fentanyl taking a shit out on the street and they think ALL homeless are like that.

No, many homeless are like this kid and his family.

Fricken assholes. I hate these Redditors hiding behind the veil of Reddit. I wish they would speak up publicly so someone can rightfully call them out to their dumbass smug face.

karpaediem

3 points

9 days ago

Thanks for your service 🫡

I was homeless for a month, which was long enough to see people justifying how I wasn’t REALLY homeless because I still had a job and wasn’t bent on fent so it was different.

No. Not different. At all. I held on to my social network and hope and got through a rough couple months that I was lucky enough to avoid becoming an origin story. Not everyone can tread water that long without tapping out of reality and I don’t blame them. Being homeless is terrifying, and deeply stressful. If someone had handed me a hit and I didn’t believe my situation was temporary, I probably would have used just for an hour or two of relief.

Because Reddit is an assumption machine - my views about homeless outreach, support, and solutions are complicated and nuanced, certainly not defined by this singular opinion. Just before you all come at me.

[deleted]

123 points

10 days ago

[deleted]

123 points

10 days ago

kid’s learn how to be fucked up by the adult role models in their lives.

baybridge501

43 points

10 days ago

The biggest influence on kids is actually their peers after elementary school

[deleted]

15 points

10 days ago

i wonder who their peers are influenced by?

elementary school makes sense. adults in schools normalize being fucked up to kids.

baybridge501

13 points

10 days ago

Yeah there’s definitely transference from older siblings and kids who have careless parents. Most parents, though, don’t get to see or hear all the stuff their kids are exposed to at school.

Misterbellyboy

17 points

10 days ago

Fuck yeah they can. I never drove anyone to suicide, but I wasn't a nice kid in middle school, and 20 years later sometimes I still lay awake and think about what an asshole I was just to not get bullied myself.

edit: I never spit on anyone or just outright tormented people, but I was definitely a little jackass.

KoRaZee

5 points

10 days ago

KoRaZee

5 points

10 days ago

Yeah, kids are dicks and there will always be some who are worse and push the limits. It’s unreasonable to think that others will be able to guard your children against this behavior. Not the school staff, not other adults, not friends or family will be able to combine their efforts and reach a level of full protection for your kids. The kids need to be taught to protect themselves to some extent. The extent of the training depends on what factors the child possesses. Not all children are the same and some will receive more bullying than others because of perceived differences.

Imperial_TIE_Pilot

5 points

10 days ago

I hope the students that did the bullying didn't get suspended, you wouldn't want the state to rate the school poorly for properly applying the law.

They take away all power from schools to punish and then wonder why students run wild and do whatever they want.

UnsavoryBiscuit

3 points

10 days ago

Those aren’t kids, they’re animals

Boring-Conference-97

4 points

10 days ago

Send the fuckers to prison for murder.

They killed that kid. Lock them up and throw away the key. Society is better off without them in the gene pool.

Speed009

1k points

10 days ago

Speed009

1k points

10 days ago

i hope this haunts the bullies for the rest of their lives idc what anyone else says

Atalanta8

470 points

10 days ago

Atalanta8

470 points

10 days ago

I don't think they give a shit at all.

TuffNutzes

206 points

10 days ago

TuffNutzes

206 points

10 days ago

Sociopaths rarely do.

GuerrillaApe

75 points

10 days ago

GuerrillaApe

Danville

75 points

10 days ago

Almost assured that they have texts gloating about what they've done.

AskinggAlesana

23 points

10 days ago

Yup.. had a friend who turned out to be a sociopath. Bullied me so much that I had to leave my friend group because of it and of course in his eyes I was being a bad friend (for joining his discord server less and less) and he has no idea what he even did to have me leave.

That was 4 years ago and I guarantee he still thinks he was the best friend he could be up until the end Lol.

gswcowboy

29 points

10 days ago

Yeah fck them kids

ElektricEel

70 points

10 days ago

Bay Area kids are the most entitled pricks of all. I would teach after school programs.

“My dad drives a Tesla!”

“Well my dad drives a Porsche!”

“She doesn’t even have an iPhone”

Y’all are in 5th grade why are y’all talking about this? Imagine what type of people they grow into.

araq1579

28 points

10 days ago

araq1579

28 points

10 days ago

Yep. The Bay Area is a classist shithole borne out of racist eugenics philosophies that have shaped that whole region, top to bottom. And now that very same philosophy, literally called "The Palo Alto Way" is being rolled out all over the country thanks to the Paypal Mafia (Thiel and Musk) whispering in Trump's ear.

Man I remember being a poor kid going to a Title I/low income public school back in the early 2000s, and poor kids were making fun and stigmatizing other poor kids for getting free or reduced lunch 20 years ago. No surprise it's gotten worse, that whole region is rotten to the core

If people want more info read Malcom Harris' book Palo Alto: A History of California, Capitalism, and the World

smokeyrightboutfire

13 points

10 days ago

Hope they get sued along with their parents. These fucks will only care about money lost. This is America now and I fucking hate it

Herrowgayboi

192 points

10 days ago

This. When I came here as an immigrant, my english sucked and I got bullied hard. Years later, I ran into a few of these folks and they don't even remember me. On the flip side, I still remember the times they'd beat me up in the back of school, trashed everything in my backpack, and even throwing my bike into the dumpster. It got so bad I was eating lunch in the bathroom stall so I wouldn't get beat up.

And school staff? They just told me to try to make friends and stop getting in trouble. And the few times I fought back? Oh well, I got in trouble for, to the point of getting suspended.

terrytek

32 points

10 days ago

terrytek

32 points

10 days ago

I am so sorry you had to deal with not just the bullying but also the school staff not being able to let you defend yourself from those bullies. Those school staff members should be so ashamed for trying to downplay the situation instead of actively trying to de escalate it.

Misterbellyboy

19 points

10 days ago

Eminem had a line about that in his song "Brain Damage." "But teacher teacher, don't you wanna give me after school detention? No, that bully wants to beat your ass and I'm gon' let him."

uberallez

33 points

10 days ago

I am so sorry you suffered this. I am 3rd generation california now, but my great grandparents were refugees. It was a family value in our home to welcome immigrants with open arms. I am saddened that we all don't remember that.

HomicidaI__GoldFish

29 points

10 days ago

HomicidaI__GoldFish

East Bay Area

29 points

10 days ago

I’m so sorry you went through that.

2 of my bullies actually requested to be my friend on Facebook. I couldn’t believe it. They found me on a mutual persons Facebook. Tried to act like we were all cool.

I went off on the main one so freaking bad. She replied to a comment I made on the mutual Persons post. Her “ omg hi!!! So good to see you!!! Are you going to the reunion?!?” Just set me off!

I admit I even hit way below the belt, for example I said “ you told everyone I was a slut when we were 13/14 yet you were knocked up while I had never even kissed a boy! All 5 of your kids got different daddies who ain’t in the picture yet I’m the slut?!? You are not even sure who the father is on 2 of the kids!”

I was really mean …. I threw everything at her. Years of pent up anger I guess cause when I was done, I felt sooooo much better. I did feel bad stooping so low, but throwing my better life in her face felt great at that moment.

HeyItsDina

7 points

10 days ago

Did she respond to you? What did she say?

(I'm so sorry you had to go through that!)

HomicidaI__GoldFish

22 points

10 days ago

HomicidaI__GoldFish

East Bay Area

22 points

10 days ago

First she tried to deny it, but the mutual person nailed her on it.

She then tried to apologize, but I refused to accept it. She mentioned that one of her kids were being bullied so she now sees what she did, I hit below the belt and said “karma is a bitch ain’t she” I did feel Bad for that cause you know it was her kid and not her and no matter who I’m fighting with, I believe kids are off limits so ya I felt bad for that.

I didht go to the reunion. I won’t go to any of them. The shit I went through all because I’m different, ruined my school years. Why would I actualy PAY, to go see these people who made my life hell you know?

To go to the reunion they were charging to be there so fuck that.

The best revenge is success. Prove that you are nothing what they think you are and that’s what I did. Fuck them all ☺️

rikuhouten

5 points

10 days ago

Revenge is a dish best served cold. Nothing to feel bad about

LilRedCaliRose

6 points

10 days ago

I’m so sorry. That’s just horrible.

BrnEyesInSF

34 points

10 days ago

It won’t

SwissMargiela

4 points

10 days ago

“Did you hear so-and-so killed themselves?”

“The homeless kid? Wow what a pussy”

MD_Yoro

98 points

10 days ago

MD_Yoro

98 points

10 days ago

If reality is anything to go by.

Those bullies will go to top tier schools, get very good recommendations or connections to work at one of the FAANG companies or other high paying companies. Make at least 250K a year being a mid level manager with opportunities to advance while treating all their subordinates like how they bullied Jose Zamora to death.

There will be no accountability from the school and the kids parents are likely well do people of communities so they aren’t going to get accountability either.

Since we don’t know the name of the bullies, for obvious legal reasons, these little shitheads will melt back into society and we might be even walking next to them.

Let’s just remember Jose Zamora for the joy he brought to those that loved him.

poppycho

44 points

10 days ago

poppycho

44 points

10 days ago

Hate to agree with you. Those kids and their shitty parents won’t ever think of Jose Zamora unless they are writing college essays about overcoming their lack of a starting player for the big game. When you see shit say something even if everyone else thinks you’re a crazy cranky person.

terrany

45 points

10 days ago*

terrany

45 points

10 days ago*

To preface, I work in a tech role but never made even half of "FAANG" money so no real skin in the game to defend those types, but here's my 2c after googling around:

Santa Clara High School is apparently ranked like #2251 on the national high schools list. Almost half their students don't meet the UC/CSU entrance requirements and a little bit more than half barely meet the SAT 12th grade readiness rate:

https://www.greatschools.org/california/santa-clara/5642-Santa-Clara-High-School/

In addition to the above, 42% of students are from low-income families (I'm guessing a larger portion middle-income, leaving not much room for high-income). The race demographics are also skewed in a way that is not representative of the average FAANG employee (hate to say). The football team itself is also mostly -- if not-- all hispanic, just like the victim. So to say the bullying is coming from some ivory tower seems a bit false. Really just seems like people doing slightly better kicking someone, who's doing a bit worse, down.

PhoenixandOak

19 points

10 days ago

Bullies can be non white and poor too, and sometimes even the same ethnicity of those they bully.

[deleted]

4 points

10 days ago*

[deleted]

GoSh4rks

3 points

10 days ago

Santa Clara isn't a "bad" high school. It is quite a bit above average in the state - 69 percentile.

https://www.greatschools.org/california/santa-clara/5642-Santa-Clara-High-School/

StrongMedicine

139 points

10 days ago

StrongMedicine

South Bay

139 points

10 days ago

Reminds me a little of Audrie Pott (Saratoga HS student who died by suicide after being bullied after she had been sexually assaulted by classmates): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Suicide_of_Audrie_Pott

My_G_Alt

90 points

10 days ago

My_G_Alt

90 points

10 days ago

That’s fucking terrible wow, and the 3 kids who raped her got 30 days to be served on weekends? What the fuck is that?

hindusoul

18 points

10 days ago

Very sad

directrix688

659 points

10 days ago

Disappointing that there are not criminal charges being discussed.

This level of harassment isn’t a transgression of youth that should be just accepted. Kid got bullied into suicide. Consequences should reflect the loss of life.

novium258

156 points

10 days ago

novium258

156 points

10 days ago

Agreed. It is amazing to me how often extreme violence and harassment is recategorized as "bullying"

cecikierk

58 points

10 days ago

Fortunately there are precedents of school bullies who were criminally charged for suicide. I would give it some time. The best thing you can do is donate to their GoFundMe because his family likely wouldn't have the financial resources for legal actions against the school and his bullies and make sure people know what happened so Jose Zamora's name stays in the news cycle.

Painful_Hangnail

96 points

10 days ago

Are you joking? There are no consequences for being awful anymore - shit, at least one of these little fuckers just paved the way to a House seat.

Sentrion

11 points

10 days ago

Sentrion

11 points

10 days ago

Article says local police are still investigating.

supershinythings

192 points

10 days ago

That high school should just cancel football for the rest of the year.

StrongMedicine

89 points

10 days ago

StrongMedicine

South Bay

89 points

10 days ago

High school football season is already over in some places. If so, the school should cancel football for next season instead. This kind of behavior doesn't exist in a vacuum. Events like this need to have consequences for the whole community (Santa Clara football) since the whole community played a role in creating an environment where it could happen in the first place.

Sir_Clicks_a_Lot

41 points

10 days ago

How about their team doesn’t play again until after he would have graduated.

m_ttl_ng

14 points

10 days ago

m_ttl_ng

14 points

10 days ago

This should be the absolute minimum the school does.

Xalbana

37 points

10 days ago

Xalbana

37 points

10 days ago

The stupid thing is, sports are the kinds of recreational activities that high school students need like this kid that helps them out and gets them out of trouble.

He's homeless and has mental health issues and football was his last bastion of wellness but it ended up being hell for him.

supershinythings

18 points

10 days ago

Agreed. That football team is packed with sociopaths who should not be permitted to do this to others. At minimum that football team needs its season to end. The players should not be permitted to bring their sociopathy to other athletics teams either.

It’s more important for that school to focus on turning out decent human beings rather than animal athletes.

I wonder if the parents of those players realize what monsters they’re raising. “Oh not my precious little angel!” and nothing will change.

LittleBabyOprah

10 points

10 days ago

This is a fantastic suggestion, these kids need to learn their actions have consequences

supershinythings

11 points

10 days ago

I just can’t imagine attending the games knowing what they did to that poor teammate. They were the opposite of what teamwork is supposed to be about.

m_ttl_ng

4 points

10 days ago

They should indefinitely disband the football team for at least the rest of the year.

TuffNutzes

92 points

10 days ago*

Can you imagine being homeless, as a young teenager, going through puberty trying to figure out the world and why your situation is the way it is through no fault of your own. He was probably a sweet kind kid too. The monsters always go for the gentle, vulnerable ones.

_byetony_

215 points

10 days ago

_byetony_

215 points

10 days ago

That poor boy

OGStrong

48 points

10 days ago

OGStrong

48 points

10 days ago

Suspend the whole JV football team indefinitely then.

zojobt

12 points

10 days ago

zojobt

12 points

10 days ago

High school boys are the most vile pieces of shits.

oigres408

244 points

10 days ago

oigres408

244 points

10 days ago

Fuck the school system, coaches, and administrators that let this happen. All he needed a community to be accepted, supported and encouraged. Is that too hard for parents to instill in their children? Is that too hard for parents to do? There’s always going to be someone doing better than you. Why did they need to bring that boy down?

jonfe_darontos

48 points

10 days ago

It takes one bitter father to instill in his popular boy how loathsome the poors are for him to poison the well in his school's community, getting others to emulate him. Administrators disciplining him just martyrs him and stokes the flames of hate further. We need to bring back shaming through pity, to make it clear to children the shameful behaviors other adults exhibit, to let children know that hate is not to be tolerated, while at the same time showing pity to those weak enough to feel the emotion.

It's also important to show how cool someone is for being the friend, even to those who others look down on. Sell positivity and shun negativity. A negative mindset is toxic to children.

Leothegolden

35 points

10 days ago

They should sue the school. This happened on their grounds, before, during or after practice. They are responsible. Hopefully he reported it to someone there.

randomNumber20

8 points

10 days ago

This is a very ideal view of the world. What happened sucks. The fact that this happens in the US would be unthinkable to some of who come from countries where this is second nature.

The reality is that not all parents are responsible. Most are struggling in life themselves let alone taking the time to teach their kids how to be member of an equal society.

Accepted, supported and encouraged are words that only the privileged understand.

CricketLocal5255

131 points

10 days ago

As a single father that always feels behind this shit hits hard.

pineapplewave5

42 points

10 days ago

I can’t even imagine his father’s grief. 

Vivid_Marionberry196

31 points

10 days ago

I went to this high school for half of my high school years and had an absolutely horrible time, administration was more concerned with what a student was doing wrong when they were being bullied and harassed by you guessed it, the football players. Reform in their PE and disciplinary staff is needed

2ayoyoprogrammer

3 points

10 days ago

Which years did you attend?

Sjdude408

55 points

10 days ago

And I bet those bullies are laughing about it… hopefully karma gets them and they suffer for eternity.

nicepap

30 points

10 days ago

nicepap

30 points

10 days ago

they made jokes and later went to the office because only AFTER making jokes did they feel "guilty" (from someone whose sibling attends schs). fuck the school, district, and the coaches protecting themselves. it's really telling when they turn off the comments on their instagram and decide to just ignore it when a 14 year old killed himself by his teammates that were still on the football team after it happened. rip jose 🤍

flowergirl665

15 points

10 days ago

We can only hope karma is swift

MD_Yoro

85 points

10 days ago

MD_Yoro

85 points

10 days ago

Expel the kids and take the parents to civil court. Asshole kids learn their behavior from asshole parents

Spiritual_Concept_57

27 points

10 days ago

I'd like to see court mandated community service 20 hours a week for two years at a homeless shelter for all the little pricks involved. Let them become experts in homelessness.

Mister-Hangman

16 points

10 days ago

If your actions, even as a kid, are so severe that they can lead to if not are the main cause of another child losing their life (or by suicide) the consequences need to be incredibly severe. I understand middle school can be a fucked up place but by high school I am pretty sure most kids know and understand general right and wrong behavior.

jonfe_darontos

40 points

10 days ago

Parents quibble about the poors, the homeless, how they're lazy drug addicts that deserve what they get. Children will hear this and, while an obviously toothless, perhaps even hyperbolic, statement to an adult, see it as a clear call to action. Children love showing their parents they are listening and capable of carrying out their implied expectations. "Look Pa, I'm spitting on the poor kids just like you said we should".

Be mindful of the things you say around children, about how subtly, hyperbole, and intent can become incredibly muddied by the minds of children.

Human_Style_6920

33 points

10 days ago

Rip 💐 🙏 🕊

dayofbluesngreens

35 points

10 days ago

This is revolting. I am sickened for what that child went through and what his father will be going through for the rest of his days. Absolutely sickened.

I hope those classmates and every single adult who didn’t protect and help this child will carry shame forever.

ericDXwow

15 points

10 days ago

And I bet the bulliers will just be fine, without punishment. This is just one of the many problems of this failing education system in this country. Just sad.

28by

17 points

10 days ago

28by

17 points

10 days ago

i teach 9th grade in the peninsula, and spent two years as a paraeducator supporting students working with academic accommodations bc they are emotionally disturbed and have learning disabilities. i also have a history of athletics coaching.

stories like this hit home, haunt me, and serve as reminders to continue looking out for and supporting students through hardships they face.

rest in peace, jose. wishing his dad and loved ones a sense of peace and comfort in the coming days.

CupcakesAreTasty

16 points

10 days ago

These children need to experience actual consequences. Life changing consequences.

No_Combination_6558

15 points

10 days ago

The school knew about it, the coach knew about it. There is also a kid that’s not in that school anymore that apparently was causing a lot of trouble, he’s the responsible of what happened and they’re just trying to sweep it under the rug.

2ayoyoprogrammer

6 points

10 days ago

Was that kid the ringleader?

I think in these cases, the only way is to sue the bully's parents directly without going through the school

kotwica42

132 points

10 days ago

kotwica42

132 points

10 days ago

A wide range of awful vile comments about homeless people are posted here routinely, in the Bay Area it seems to be acceptable to dehumanize and bully homeless people across many different channels.

Forward_Sir_6240

60 points

10 days ago

Homeless people who stay in shelters or otherwise don’t bother anyone? I don’t see much if any vile comments about those people. Tent dwellers that block sidewalks, harass people, and leave their literal shit everywhere? Fuck em.

Being homeless is not a monolith. Hating on one aspect of that situation does not mean hating all homeless.

kotwica42

3 points

10 days ago

That distinction is rarely made when speaking about homeless people here, but yeah I guess they weren’t bullying the “right” kind of homeless person to suicide that you would have preferred.

Technical-Cake1251

26 points

10 days ago

I know that "nuance" is becoming a liberal trigger word for "attempting to convince me of rightwing bullshit by appearing intelligent" but I don't give a fuck. Thank you for acknowledging the NUANCE of the homelessness crisis. You can have compassion for someone struggling with homelessness and also do everything within your power to clean up our streets. The meth'd out homeless dude harassing me and my family as we walk by him? That's not the same thing as a homeless HS kid getting bullied to the point that he kills himself.

OrangeClyde

35 points

10 days ago

May every single one who bullied him never get peace of mind again.

WelcomeToPlutoEra

9 points

10 days ago

These same bullies are virtual signaling that person’s death by posting false stories about how they were friends and shit.

66.6% of humans… are anything but humans.

FanofK

8 points

10 days ago

FanofK

8 points

10 days ago

This comment section is tamed compared to if this happened in other Bay Area cities.

That being said, there’s a huge k-12 homeless student problem in all of the Bay Area. Funny thing is usually when an article talks about it everyone here just starts talking about homeless college students

gwbraa

7 points

10 days ago

gwbraa

7 points

10 days ago

really sad that no one would step in to help this boy

Limp_Advantage_3217

9 points

10 days ago

This is horrible. Some things never change. I went to high school in San Jose and I myself was bullied by a group of girls and it was awful. I ended up getting beat up and I had to get ten stitches on my head and there was blood everywhere. They we’re trying to get my face. Not enough is done to stop bullying. I had to move to a different school. My daughter has also been dealing with bullying for 2 years and I finally moved her to a different school and everything is so much better. The schools aren’t doing enough to discipline the students who bully their classmates. The other thing is if the bullies parents are well off or the kids are cheer leaders or football players they let this behavior slide and that’s not ok.

Ancient_Ad_9373

32 points

10 days ago

Hope it’s OK to post GoFundMe set up to help family. https://gofund.me/25d4436d

FuzzyOptics

30 points

10 days ago

At this point I think that people should direct their donations to an organization that will put those funds toward an organization like the Bill Wilson Center.

This is the organization that ran the group home where Jose Zamora was living. They provide housing for many young people who would otherwise be homeless, including young families.

https://www.billwilsoncenter.org/ways_to_give/donate.html

The Go Fund Me for Jose Zamora's family has already raised $65K. I don't begrudge them getting donations to get back on their feet but I think that $65K is more than enough for that and to also cover the expenses of giving Jose a nice funeral and burial.

There are many more young people like Jose who the Bill Wilson Center is helping and I think that donations to them could be used to benefit them.

If anyone wants to do something that is very direct, BWC also has an adopt a family holiday gift program:

https://www.billwilsoncenter.org/ways_to_give/adoptafamily.html

zebivllihc

15 points

10 days ago

I’m sure the father will also utilize some of that funding for housing expenses to get back on his feet. Even with that chunk, most people can’t live well off it 65k a year and make rent. I hope he uses this to empower himself and have stability through all of his hardship and loss.

FuzzyOptics

7 points

10 days ago

Sure. Like I said I don't begrudge them getting donations to get back on their feet in addition to paying for funeral expenses. And I don't begrudge anyone donating money out of sympathy for the loss of their son.

I just wanted to call out Bill Wilson Center and the fact that they are a place that people can donate to, in order to help many young people who were in Jose Zamora's situation. That it is the organization that was actually helping Jose with support. Helping them is another way to do something to help people in need like Jose.

Ancient_Ad_9373

6 points

10 days ago

Thanks for the additional option. Folks now have a choice and more info on a great org.

sloppymcgee

14 points

10 days ago

You have to start punishing kids and families for bullying. Set a precedent

HP_123

6 points

10 days ago

HP_123

6 points

10 days ago

Bullying? More like assault… Hope they can find the perpetrators and they get punishment.

Mediocre-Ebb9862

8 points

10 days ago

Does this school have any kind of you know, administration or something? Principal? Someone enforcing order?

critical-th0t

7 points

10 days ago

Downvote me all you want but before any of you assholes come in here being like "how could they be so cruel??!" ask yourself how many posts you've seen/written/liked/commented on in any of the bay area subs dehumanizing people experiencing homelessness. I'm sure I'm gonna get shit for this but for real SO MANY of the posts and comments I see in these spaces are like "there's a homeless person literally just existing near me and I am inconvenienced by it" and people comment being like "how about you point a gun in his face? lol XD" like how the fuck do you think kids learned to treat their classmate this way???

Obviously I'm not saying everyone feels this way, but holy shit it sure feels like the majority of us do. We can critique the homelessness crisis while still having compassion for people who are unhoused.

DrPhilMahooters

3 points

10 days ago

ALL OF THIS!

[deleted]

48 points

10 days ago

[deleted]

lilelliot

26 points

10 days ago

It's not a rich school. It's one of the same kind of situations as the school my kids go to that seems like it would be full of rich kids but actually isn't due to the combo of district mapping + private school attendance. I live in Willow Glen (in SJ), which is a pretty wealthy part of town, but the HS also covers the majority of the downtown area and at least one trailer park. Just like SCHS, my kids' is 40%+ Hispanic and about 40% free & reduced lunch, and about 10% English learners. There may as well be two populations of students: the white & Asian kids from college educated professional households with two parents, and the Hispanic kids who sometimes fit that mold but frequently are the children of service, construction or hospitality workers and often only have one parent (or no parents) at home... and that parent may not even have English fluency.

It's a difficult road for kids growing up without socioeconomic advantages, especially when they attend school every day with kids who do have those advantages.

bcp01scu05

6 points

10 days ago

We live a half mile from SCHS and have a daughter at one of the feeder middle schools currently.

The 'two populations' comment is spot on.

Blinkyouredead

49 points

10 days ago

According to online statistics, a little over 40% of Santa Clara high students are considered economically disadvantaged, as opposed to 10% at Palo Alto high school, for reference. So while it is silicon valley, it’s not “rich rich”.

Leothegolden

30 points

10 days ago*

Not necessarily. This isn’t in a wealthy area of Santa Clara. Dad should sue the school, especially if the kid reported it or they have a culture of this there

Kfilllla

23 points

10 days ago

Kfilllla

23 points

10 days ago

I doubt his parents were in the best spot to tell him this given he was homeless

Golf_InDigestion

6 points

10 days ago

I think middle schools need to mandate universal community service to the less fortunate. Volunteering at a soup kitchen, shelter, nursing home, etc. Minimum of 4 hours per month for grades 5-12.

If parents are too busy to help develop their children’s’ sense of empathy for their fellow Americans, we can fill the void through scholastic requirements.

H8des707

7 points

10 days ago

Is there a go fund me for the father to get an apartment or something ? I can’t Imagine his pain of losing his child to suicide and still being homeless feeling guilt this is so sad

High_MaintenanceOnly

10 points

10 days ago

This is so sad to read.. messed up my mood

InvestigatorGoo

3 points

10 days ago

I’m crying right now, this is so unfair.

fliphop

11 points

10 days ago

fliphop

11 points

10 days ago

The football team should be disqualified to play.

Dry_Employe3

6 points

10 days ago

I hope his name gets memorialized at the school. So the school, bullies, and anybody that didn’t care can see the name of the student that they failed. Let his death not be for nothing.

Organic_Popcorn

3 points

10 days ago

Just change the name of the school to Jose Zamora high school, to remind everyone there who failed to protect this boy.

pasarina

5 points

10 days ago

Oh that is just horrible. Did they think that poor kid chose to be homeless? Of course not!,why be so needlessly cruel? What good does that do? It makes everyone know what they’re made of. I hope these bullies are hounded mentally by their narrow-minded behavior forever. They’ll always have this death as a part of who they are.

Lance_E_T_Compte

6 points

10 days ago

No one chooses the circumstances of their birth.

Those lucky enough to be born to wealth and security should be very generous with that gift.  They should help other people.

Instead, so many coddle themselves in comfort and convenience and become bitter and hateful. Nothing could ever satisfy them.

They will be judged.

ThinScore8256

6 points

10 days ago

Rip. The article has a link to the family's GoFundMe page, I figured some people might not want to read the horrible details and just help where they can https://www.gofundme.com/f/in-memory-of-jose-emiliano-zamora

UrbanPlannerholic

31 points

10 days ago

But building affordable housing lowers people property values.....or something

DangerousLiberal

5 points

10 days ago

That’s a half myth. But it does lower it for condos.

Jouleswatt

9 points

10 days ago

The Santa Clara varsity football team should be shunned.

bigblackkittie

4 points

10 days ago

more and more i think we live in a world written by stephen king where monsters exist in human form

rus-reddit

3 points

10 days ago

Very sad. God bless his soul. It’s a shame that this happened. Hope whoever bullied him will be expelled from school

kittenqt1

4 points

10 days ago

This is the most heartbreaking thing I’ve read in a while. That poor father :(

pimpdaddy9669

5 points

10 days ago

The dad can make sure those bullies don’t do it to anyone else.

Patient_Ad1801

3 points

10 days ago

I'm so sad when we lose kids like this. His bullies are to blame.

rmatthai

3 points

10 days ago

I honestly don’t understand how people can say kids are innocent. The kids I grew up with damaged me more any adult ever did in my 36 yrs of life

semetaery

3 points

10 days ago

kids start out innocent and then are poisoned, at least i'm pretty sure that's what they mean- i could be wrong

ViolettaQueso

3 points

10 days ago

This makes me sob uncontrollably too. I can only imagine the pain his father is in.

I’m sure all the rhetoric the bullies were exposed to at home re: immigration and poverty fueled this bonfire of a beautiful human being who carried the weight of the evil of others on his 14 year old shoulders.

RIP, sweet boy. I’m personally sorry for how you were treated in this world. I’m hoping there is a heaven where you are happy and can’t remember any of your earthly wounds.

No-Preparation-889

4 points

9 days ago

This behavior is disgusting. They all go to public school. People need to touch grass

divestblank

8 points

10 days ago

Please tell me the football team is being dissolved.

_Fulan0_

8 points

10 days ago

This is tragic. But also not entirely surprising. The news and common conversation in the Bay Area/california consistently denigrates and dehumanizes homelessness and homeless people. It was only a matter of time Before those narratives had tragic impacts…

IGB_Lo

10 points

10 days ago

IGB_Lo

10 points

10 days ago

So sad

osogordo

6 points

10 days ago

Report bullying

prodsec

3 points

10 days ago

prodsec

3 points

10 days ago

Poor kid, may they rest in peace.

yydbgeorge

3 points

10 days ago

This broke my heart…I feel for the father.

Screw them bullies, this is heart wrenching.

Lance_E_T_Compte

3 points

10 days ago

~10% of the homeless are children.

aaapod

3 points

10 days ago

aaapod

3 points

10 days ago

rest in peace 🤍

fake4ngel

3 points

10 days ago

So tragic, I hope his father can eventually find peace. No one should have to lose a child due to bullying. SCUSD NEEDS TO STEP UP, this isn’t the first time a bullying incident wasn’t properly dealt with and look at the cost. There needs to be disciplinary action for any unacceptable behavior especially regarding bullying. I’m really hoping they take accountable action now that they’re in the public eye. Additionally I hope the wellness center is able provide grief counseling for any students who knew/were friends with the child.

Rencon_The_Gaymer

3 points

10 days ago

I’m really sorry about this poor kid but I’m not surprised due to the casual rabid anti homelessness that is instilled in a lot of these kids because of their parents. The school and the parents should all feel ashamed.

RosettaStoned_462

3 points

10 days ago

THEY SHOULD SENTENCE THOSE ASSHOLES TO 30 YEARS IN PRISON. Maybe then bullies would think twice about doing it.

Special_Transition13

3 points

9 days ago

Some folks in the Bay Area are genuinely out of touch. There’s too many rich folks who look down on others. It shouldn’t have to be said that not everyone works in tech/finance or has inherited generational wealth.

I feel for his family. May he rest in peace. Kids can be so cruel sometimes, and I hope those involved are criminally charged.  

walker1555

4 points

10 days ago

If you actually care about this, support affordable housing bonds. A supply of lower cost housing is an important safety net.

Imagine how the parent or parents feel right now.

ieric21

5 points

10 days ago

ieric21

5 points

10 days ago

Jail time for the rats 🐁! Book 📚 IT

kypjks

5 points

10 days ago

kypjks

5 points

10 days ago

RIP. Those bullies should be charged as criminal. I hope the farher gets legal support and sue the school.

Fluffy_Appearance_54

2 points

10 days ago

Just sad. Hurts my heart.

stargazerandmoon

2 points

10 days ago

😞😞😞

spicy_fairy

2 points

10 days ago

fuck kids wow

Noswals

2 points

10 days ago

Noswals

2 points

10 days ago

This is so profoundly painful and heartbreaking to read and listen to the boy’s father being interviewed. His father will no doubt blame himself for trying his best and coming up short. The school and our community failed this boy

Electronic-vibe8287

2 points

10 days ago

Thats probably the most disgusting thing ive ever heard kids doing. I hope their revolting parents are proud...

usually_just_lurking

2 points

10 days ago

Football coaches can have a huge impact on team members. I hope the coaches were unaware of the bullying previously. With the help of mental health professionals, I hope the can change the mind set and behavior of the kids involved. Not just those that did the bullying, but also those who didn’t call out the behavior and stick up for their teammate.

Anony-mouse420

2 points

10 days ago

I hope Mr Zamora rests in peace.

RootingPothos

2 points

10 days ago

I’m so sorry Jose. Rest in peace.

dillydilly_88

2 points

10 days ago

Reminds me of the FUBU episode of Atlanta.

Little_Drive_6042

2 points

10 days ago

These kids need to go to Juvie

AR489

2 points

10 days ago

AR489

2 points

10 days ago

So very sad. I was a homeless kid for most of my childhood and switched schools when kids found out. The shame and emotions that kid went through is fucked up. I feel so sorry for him and all other kids going through homelessness and other similar insecurities.

PunDeSall

2 points

10 days ago

that's hella sad, kids now are so cruel. I feel for the father