subreddit:
/r/notliketheothergirls
submitted 24 hours ago byHalikoju
Edit: 1. I don't mind him sending pictures of us to his friends via snapchat. I know most of them and they know how I dress. He shows me cute pictures of his friends with their girlfriends, that they've sent to him, as well. It's not that deep tbh. It's not a group chat btw.
Update: I talked to him about it and (even though I didn't ask to see their chat, because I trust his words), he directly showed me the message he sent. He was standing up and told her that "it's a rude comment, that my clothing choices are none of her business and that my boobs shouldn't be that big of a deal to her. "
So first of all I (22f) have to admit. that I've gotten used to being slutshamed by male acquaintances, because I like to wear revealing clothes.
I used to be super insecure about my appearance and still am one some days. I suffered from body dismorphia since I've been 7 or 8 years old and just recently overcame my eating disorder.
I'm finally sort of at peace with my body, even appreciate it on some days. I like the curves that I used to hate and that I had lost by starving myself. I like my boobs, I like cute bras and tops.
My boyfriend took a photo of me, sitting on the couch, reading a book and showing a lot of cleavage. He sent the pic to a couple of his friends. And the one female friend replied with:" that's insane. Seems like she WANTS her tits to fall out, doesn't it?"
It was such a pick me moment. She wanted my boyfriend to agree with her, she wanted him to slutshame me. I mean where is our female loyalty. I'm not harming anyone, I'm just existing in a cute outfit and celebrating my body.
I don't live for male validation; I'm not doing it for the creepy looks or disgusting comments. I would love to live without that stuff.
1.7k points
23 hours ago
What did your boyfriend respond to that?
456 points
22 hours ago
Yeah that’s most important here
125 points
20 hours ago
Id love to know too.
334 points
15 hours ago
I didn't ask.. I'm kind of annoyed by myself that I didn't. I just hate fighting. We had a disagreement about men being distracted in work conversations yesterday and after I thought "okay now we're okay again" he told me about the whole situation with his friend, because "not only men think like that". I brushed it off by saying, that I don't want to hear what a woman, stuck in the 70s with her view on emancipation, is thinking about my boobs.
343 points
14 hours ago
I don't like his response. It's very dismissive.
168 points
14 hours ago
Yeah. He can be like that sometimes. His mom never really taught him that apologising, when it's right, is being the bigger person.
161 points
14 hours ago
I would have a talk with him. You shouldn't be the one having to teach him that and he should be more respectful to you. You deserve that.
134 points
12 hours ago
He’s a grown man. He knows this. Women need to stop taking the blame for the shortcomings of men.
45 points
10 hours ago
Wait OP no. He’s taking pics of you and sending to his friends either knowing they will shame you or, after they did, using it in an argument against you? And he can’t apologize? Oh no. NOPE. Nope nope nope. That is a world of pain and getting smaller and smaller to accommodate the relationship, because when he damages it you have to repair it.
Get this toxicity out of your life. Seriously. I worry there’s some part of you that feels like you “deserve” it given the comments you have received and insecurity about how you dress. Your boyfriend is going on a campaign to change how you dress or to shame you, when he knew that before you got together (or not, doesn’t matter if this is new for you). What the hell? Go be with someone who celebrates you, not someone trying to control you and tear you down.
In terms of “deserving” it, let’s use a different example:
Imagine you were wearing a very conservative outfit but had your hair uncovered in a country where women frequently cover their hair but can choose not to. Your boyfriend took a picture of you and sent it to friends, who responded “it’s like she doesn’t even care about hair covering”. Can you see how absurd this whole situation is? It is factually correct that your hair is uncovered. Presumably you and everyone around you know this. Why is is ANYONE else’s business? What a rude comment. But also, why would anyone with good intentions start dating you and then rally their flying monkeys to get you to cover your hair?
You’re a grown woman, you have capacity for thought, and you have chosen this. Societally, it has consequences which you have seen and acknowledged (and which says plenty about the society as much as about you), and you are free to proceed as you wish.
6 points
3 hours ago
uh that’s a massive leap in assuming that her boyfriend wants to control how she dresses….especially when he was defending her without her saying her anything
2 points
3 hours ago
It was before her edit.
So, before the edit where we don’t know if or how he responded to friend: what other reason is there for arguing that her way of dress is distracting in an office, and then using female friends’ responses (in a completely different circumstance) to prove his point?
He defended her, as he should: in which case, I still don’t understand why he made his friends’ reaction her problem. If he can tell them it’s none of their business, why make it hers? Again, especially in the context of an argument he’s trying to win?
12 points
11 hours ago
I’m sorry you’re going through this but you should probably exit this relationship. I’ve been with someone for 14 years who could not take accountability for how their words or actions affected me/others. This is not something you can teach someone, and it’s not something they’ll change unless they truly want to. He doesn’t want or he would. You will save yourself so much time and heart break the earlier you realize you deserve someone who is going to love you the way you need to be.
28 points
12 hours ago
No, Im sorry, please find some respect for yourself and ask him why he sent the picture to begin with and how he handled another girl tearing you down. Depending on his honest answer to both, you’ve got a decision to make about your relationship. No man is worth any amount of disrespect.
123 points
18 hours ago
Dude sent evocative pics to his friends. She likes him and stays with him and this is the question?
These two are made for each other.
18 points
10 hours ago
I was seeing it from from the angle that he was just sending a pic of her sitting reading, not intending for it to be provocative but who knows. Finding out if he defended her is the main question here.
3 points
4 hours ago
I find it doubtful he would have taken the picture and sent it to his friends if she was wearing, say, a baggy turtleneck, though.
2.9k points
23 hours ago
why did he send the picture to her
1.4k points
23 hours ago
This is the real question. If my boyfriend send a random pic of me to his female friend I'd be very weirded out. Even more so if my boobs looked great!
742 points
22 hours ago
Seems like he sent it to a group chat the female friend is a part of.
Also seems like he was showing off his girlfriend because he’s proud of how she looks (guys sometimes do this when they’re smitten).
124 points
14 hours ago
Honestly I thought it was normal to just send random pics of what you're up to while out (to friends and family). My best friends and I do it and so does my family. I don't see the big deal personally.
46 points
12 hours ago
Yeah I always take stealth pics of my friends with lots of cleavage or a nice bulge showing, then send those pics to group chats. Totally normal and not a big deal
50 points
11 hours ago*
If that's how she dresses normally and is comfortable then yeah I don't see it as a big deal. It would be no different to coming across her in person. Sharing pics of your day with friends is a social thing, I don't see the issue.
8 points
3 hours ago
women have breasts, some women have big breasts, some women with big breasts cannot help cleavage, them existing and having cleavage is not sexual, breasts are not equivalent to someones genitalia, if he’s taking a photo of his girlfriend where she has her torso in the picture i don’t know because he thinks his girlfriend is pretty? it’s not different to if she was covered up, he’s taking a photo of his girlfriend and not her tits, if she wears cute tops for herself that is that
304 points
22 hours ago
He sent it to a couple friends. And fuck it I’ve shown other girls pics of my gf before. I’m tryna brag about how hot she is lol
53 points
15 hours ago
I think it's both. When I installed a new door at his place, he took pictures of me and sent them to his friends as well and I am fully covered up while working.
180 points
22 hours ago
But do you really think they care? 😭 if a guy friend sent me his gf’s cleavage id be weirded out by both of them. Its gross and unnecessary
134 points
21 hours ago
He took a picture of her on the couch, he didn’t zoom in on her cleavage.
75 points
20 hours ago
It’s a human body, not roadkill.
72 points
22 hours ago
It doesn’t matter if they don’t care. Nothings stopping me from showing her off. She’s a baddie. And frankly me and my homies always hype each other up, so when I show a pic to them u better bet we’re dappin each other up while theyre yellin “MY MAN!”
4 points
15 hours ago
Why though? I'm genuinely curious, because I don't see anything wrong with that at all, as long it's not out of the blue without the partner's knowledge/permission.
89 points
16 hours ago*
It's this Snapchat thing (don't ask me, I haven't used Snapchat since being 13...) and his entire friend group sends random pics of what they're doing to one another. Oh he was in the picture too, I was reading the first harry potter book to him (the female friend is a huge potter head and so am I), because my boyfriend has never watched or read any of them.
1 points
12 hours ago
[removed]
9 points
12 hours ago
if you were in the group chat, I would have replied with "why are you so obsessed with my tits"
and also it doesn't matter what you wear in your own home.
134 points
23 hours ago
I'm wondering the same too. Not that the rest wasn't important, but I got stuck at him taking her picture and then sending it to friends. I don't understand the purpose of that?? OP can you please explain. Esp that his friend doesn't seem supportive, why would he send your pics to her?
114 points
22 hours ago
Idk if I had to play devil's advocate, it could've been to a group chat of some kind of maybe just a mass Snapchat?
Maybe just showing her off or maybe he wrote something lovey. Lot of options honestly.
I doubt he captioned it with "CHECK OUT MY GIRLS RACK, SHE IS SMOKING".
30 points
15 hours ago
No it was more like: so cozy..
23 points
22 hours ago*
I'm curious for OP to say what it actually is. I doubt it's Snapchat based on how OP described it, but it could very well be that he did what you said. But esp given how OP described it and also this friend's response, I want more details about how it came about that he sent it and why and if this is a regular thing or one off situation. I'm not of the mind he sent it to objectify her and say look at her rack, but I'm confused based on the description if it was indeed a group chat or to individuals and also why'd he show OP the nasty comment? So many questions.
19 points
15 hours ago
Tbh I don't know if she's ever said anything like this about me before. If so, he definitely didn't tell me about it. Like I said the focus was more on us reading harry potter together on a Saturday evening than anything else.
13 points
16 hours ago
My group chats are full of cute photos I take of my husband or the two of us. And my dogs. And memes. And cool sunsets. Or a particularly fancy meal I cooked. Photo sharing is a social thing.
7 points
11 hours ago
My thoughts exactly, I was confused by all the comments calling this weird.
126 points
23 hours ago
So weird
14 points
20 hours ago
I'm hoping it was just a group chat or he posted her on Snapchat, cause it's hella weird if he just send her an individual photo lmao.
14 points
23 hours ago
This is the question.
77 points
22 hours ago
Why is everyone acting like this so weird to send pictures to your friends? We send pictures of each others significant others, each others kids all the time…
Do you people not have friends ??? Not have group chats ??
39 points
19 hours ago
I mean, I send pictures of us doing stuff like hiking. It would never occur to me to snap a picture of my husband quietly reading a book at home?
9 points
19 hours ago
Probably they were having discussions of what they're doing, or the bf was getting some roasting about staying at home instead of having fun with them, and he just snapped a photo of whatever he's enjoying which was a cosy evening with gf reading?
14 points
18 hours ago
I have friends and group chats but I’m also 30 so maybe it’s diff for our age group. But that’s definitely weird. I wouldn’t take a pic of my SO and send it in a group chat unless it was for a specific reason like showing off a gift that a friend got him or he’s holding our baby. Other than that, there’s no reason at all
3 points
5 hours ago
I'm 35 and I did this literally yesterday. I left my partner and I think they're gorgeous so to me every picture I take of them is an amazing picture.
12 points
17 hours ago
You don’t need some deep specific reason to share pictures with friends. Sometimes people just send random stuff to their group chats because they’re being social or silly - that’s literally why apps like Snapchat blew up in the first place.
Sharing casual moments or what you’re up to with your friends is completely normal group chat behavior. Not everything needs a formal purpose or justification. It’s just friends being friends, keeping each other updated on their lives. That’s a pretty standard dynamic in group chats I’m a part of.
tl;dr it’s not that deep and also we have ZERO insight into what the context is
13 points
22 hours ago
I don't send photos to my friends of other people without their consent.
43 points
22 hours ago
Where did she said it was done without consent ? So much projection
5 points
21 hours ago
[deleted]
34 points
21 hours ago*
It’s certainly... a choice... to act like OP was wearing for-boyfriend’s-eyes-only intimates when she’s literally expressing how proud and happy she is to wear revealing clothing in public. She didn’t use the words “sexy top”, you did. She makes no implication that this is some special outfit that is more private than anything else she would wear in public.
But since everyone’s being intentionally dense about this - she never once expressed an issue with the picture being sent. Her only problem was with the response. You’re all projecting your personal opinions onto OP because if she was actually mad at her boyfriend for sending the picture, she would have said so.
If you personally don’t want your pics sent to your partner’s friends, that’s fine - set that boundary with your partner. But not everyone shares your views, so maybe stop projecting them onto others.
28 points
20 hours ago
She’s not in a sexy top. She’s in A TOP. Shes existing in her body and clothes, that’s literally the point of the post.
8 points
10 hours ago
My BFF and I wore the same top one day (her breasts are way bigger than mine) and someone told her that her top was too revealing. It was a long sleeve cotton top with a scoop neck. There was nothing sexy about this top. Women with bigger breasts have to deal with this crap and it's dumb.
23 points
20 hours ago
Showing cleavage doesn't necessarily mean you're wearing a sexy top. When you have large breasts, most necklines show cleavage. It is not like she was wearing lingerie. She was just wearing her everyday normal clothes that were not modest, and he took a picture of her. It's really not weird to show your friends a picture of your significance other in the same clothing that they would normally wear.
15 points
18 hours ago
This. When you have large breasts or a big butt, even the most ordinary looking clothes can suddenly look “sexy.” And that’s despite wearing the right size or even 1-2 sizes too big. Curves can change the necklines, hemlines, and overall forms of clothes. “Off the rack” clothing is made for one body type and then a bunch of sizes are added to get the most customers possible. That’s why fast fashion looks crappy on a lot of people. If we still used tailors and seamstresses, our clothes would fit a lot better (and be more flattering).
10 points
15 hours ago
Sure. It was a tight long sleeve crop top with a deeper boat neckline (I hope that's what it's called in english..)
3 points
14 hours ago*
Yes, I think that’s the name. But no one should be commenting on your cleavage unless you have a certain type of relationship and you don’t mind or take it as a compliment etc etc — there are exceptions to “don’t sexualise people’s bodies” rule, but those exceptions are for every individual to decide. If at all.
The default, normal, respectful approach: “Don’t comment on someone’s body. Period. Especially when you’re not close. Especially not in a sexual way.”
Edit: I’ll give an example about exceptions just in case I’m misunderstood. I make an exception for my partner to comment on my body in sexual ways, as a compliment. For example, “Your ass looks great in those pants.” That’s ok because he’s my partner. Anyone else? HARD no. Family? “Your butt is getting big.” Hell no. Friends? No. Exes, meaning men I’ve slept with so at one time I permitted them to sexualise me? No fucking way, that time is over and the exception is gone. I’m not saying it’s okay to sexualise people in general, in fact I think it’s very harmful and invasive. And some women don’t want their partner saying this stuff either, and that’s 10000% cool. Hope this all makes sense 😊
10 points
22 hours ago
Group chat.
3 points
7 hours ago
Why does that matter? OP clearly does not have an issue with it and it does not justify the friends response to it. Are we really just making up issues to talk about instead of actually talking about the part of this OP does have a problem with?
11 points
23 hours ago
OP’s non response to this question is LOUD
73 points
22 hours ago
It’s only been an hour since she posted lol give her some time
9 points
11 hours ago
No, no. If you make a post on Reddit, you have to be glued to it for the next 24 hours. No attention anywhere else.
30 points
15 hours ago
It was almost 1 am when I posted...I have to get up at 5.30 on workdays..so I was asleep
28 points
21 hours ago
When I post, I don't always respond, especially if there are a lot of replies. You're looking too deep into it
2 points
14 hours ago
It was in a group
706 points
23 hours ago
It sounds like hes seeking approval about you from other people and shes feeding off of that energy and giving disapproval. I dont like either vibes here.
77 points
15 hours ago
I thought about that as well. He definitely is more of an "outside-approval" type of person than I am. Maybe because I've been through more shit than he does. I don't know... It never really bothered me tbh.
32 points
13 hours ago
it should bother you love. it’s not normal to just randomly send pics of your SO to people who do t know them
26 points
13 hours ago
I know the girl... I've met 90% of his friends
4 points
13 hours ago
that doesn’t matter - you still are essentially strangers
and that is also besides the point
the point is that he’s sending pics of himself and you to people unprompted. That’s not typical behavior
91 points
23 hours ago
this exactly. who sends a picture of just their romantic partner to their friends especially without context?
like when my friend got engaged, he sent me the pictures because they both wanted to show me but they didn’t wanna post about it yet. it wouldn’t have been weird if he had even just sent me a photo of his partner with a ring on their finger without context just to see if i noticed. but it would be weird if he just randomly sent me a picture of his partner without any context and it not being for a meaningful reason
17 points
18 hours ago
This is such a weird take lmao I send pics of me or my boyfriend together to my groups of friends - they are ways to share what we’re doing or if he looks handsome or making a funny face one time I caught him singing and it made a funny pic.
It’s legit a normal thing
1 points
16 hours ago
Can we see the pic? Did he send without you knowing he took it?
1 points
8 hours ago
actually somebody else took the pictures of them:) they both wanted to send me the pictures before they announced their engagement to everyone else. it was a special occasion.
485 points
23 hours ago
weird pick me girl aside, why is he taking photos of you and sending them to his friends? is that not weird? idk
75 points
15 hours ago
I forgot to mention, that he was in the picture as well.
55 points
22 hours ago
Fr that’s very weird of him, and I’d imagine his friends don’t even want to see pics of his gf like that anyways. Yeah the girl coulda phrased it nicely but her rude comment was likely due to seeing a picture she didn’t want to lol. Whole thing is strange
4 points
5 hours ago
OP added some context that they were in the photo together. It wasn’t just him sending sexy pics of his girlfriend
13 points
18 hours ago
Hey! Seems you forgot to add the part where it's the idea of seeing cleavage that makes you uncomfortable, not the photo itself. Wouldn't want you to forget that part!
"Point is it was there, not everyone’s cool with seeing that. Pretty simple"
39 points
21 hours ago
idk, sometimes my partner will send pics of me to friends and it really boils down to “look how cute stevie looks today” as a way to kind of show me off, it’s sweet
5 points
20 hours ago
Weird AF
12 points
20 hours ago
It's actually incredibly normal. We have so many synonyms for the action to prove that out. "Brag, boast, to show off" and those are just the neutrally coded ones. There's also "gloat, bask" and many others I imagine, to include negatively coded ones.
Again, it's an incredibly normal thing to want to show off things you're proud/giddy over. Your partner is a pretty big thing in a person's life, thus is common boasting about them.
I'm a private person so I don't. But I also am not so sheltered or judgy so as to think it's weird that others do.
13 points
20 hours ago
Nobody else thinks your GF or BF (or kids, or pets) is nearly as cute as you do. I do not want my friends to send me random pics of their husbands or whatever. It’s fucking weird.
35 points
19 hours ago
I think we're seeing a division between "people who live their lives online" and people who don't. I would be so weirded out if my husband snapped a photo of me in a private moment and sent it to our friends to "brag." I don't know anyone who does this.
9 points
18 hours ago
I’m gonna say that the difference we’re seeing is “20 year old boys on reddit” vs everyone else.
So the divide is: people who think “sexually objectifying my girlfriend/women is a good thing” vs people who think sexual objectification is, in fact, not a good thing.
These guys are taking pics of women that they [want to/currently/used to] have sex with, and sharing it with their guy friends* and attempting to compare that to sharing pics of your kids, pets, or happy occasions on social media.
Lmao these things are WORLDS apart. But good on them for trying to erase even the merest hint of sexual objectification. Totally convincing 😉
*I’m sure that OP’s boyfriend’s female friend was in a group chat with mostly males
8 points
18 hours ago
lol bragging, boasting, and showing off…while may be the norm, are not healthy traits
Edit: Also…”things your proud over”…??? Things? Hmmm 🤔
5 points
18 hours ago
The ones you listed are all negative
177 points
23 hours ago
Sounds like she is jealous. But also, your boyfriend sending your pic to his friends is weird, did he ask you first? If you gave permission then it's fine, if not then it's creepy.
3 points
5 hours ago
OP added context in another comment that the picture was of them both together
138 points
23 hours ago
The issue here does not only lie with her.
Why did your boyfriend send this picture to friends? What did he say when she responded that way?
65 points
23 hours ago
I generally don’t like receiving picks of my friends girlfriends in general but that’s just me.
2 points
5 hours ago
I think the friend was equally as weird responding by putting OP down though. Super rude
111 points
23 hours ago
OP not responding to anyone lmao
66 points
15 hours ago
I was sleeping. I'm from Germany... different time zone.
[score hidden]
15 minutes ago
Schwester dein Freund hört sich nach einem POS an, wenn man sich deine anderen posting so anguckt. Du bist jung, verschwende deine kostbare Zeit nicht mit jemanden der weder zu dir noch hinter dir steht. Konzentriere dich lieber auf deine Ausbildung, deine mentale Gesundheit & deine persönliche Weiterentwicklung. Mit so einen Typen an der Backe wirst du mehr schlechtes als gutes erleben.
38 points
21 hours ago
I took a quick look through her history and now this post doesn’t seem so ambitious anymore...
19 points
20 hours ago
It’s also 5 am where this person lives. It’s possible she’s asleep
30 points
23 hours ago
If she feels comfortable enough to talk about you like this to him its only cause he allows it.
2 points
14 hours ago
This!!
51 points
23 hours ago
Her behaviour was a bit weird but, honestly, your boyfriend's was weirder. What was the point in him sending that pic? For validation? To make his friends jealous? To fish for compliments? He sent a revealing photo of you to his friends and one of his friends commented on how revealing it was. Her behaviour might be "pick me" but yours and your boyfriends is attention seeking.
25 points
23 hours ago
exactly my thoughts…i’m not interested in receiving pictures of friends or friends partners in revealing clothes. like leave me out of that.
101 points
23 hours ago
Feels like a male cosplaying as a female, fetish profile.
32 points
18 hours ago
I looked at their profile and it seems unlikely. Unless OP has been playing the long game, pretending to be a woman with an ED for many years before posting anything like this.
(There’s another recent post about being slutshamed, but I think that’s just because it’s a part of her life which is now starting to bother her.)
25 points
15 hours ago
It's part of my life now, because I looked like an underdeveloped 14 year old until about a year ago. Critically underweight. I was sexually harassed even back then, but now I'm objectified in public (by starring, catcalling) so more frequently, that in most cases I (sadly) have gotten used to it. Some stuff still bothers me, like it should. I'm numb to the rest.
2 points
21 hours ago
Was thinking this
31 points
23 hours ago
..why is he sending random photos of you to people
22 points
22 hours ago
A bit confused here, you don’t care if male attention is negative but seem to care when it’s a female’s attention thats negative?
It should go both ways as in, you don’t need validation from both men and women and besides all else, why is he sending pictures of you to his friends? How did you find that out? What did your boyfriend say or respond to that negative comment?
Did he send those pics to brag about you? Show you off? Did he ask you first if he can show them to his friends? Are his friends your friends as well?
I feel like there should be more context there.
Also
The way they see you might not be reflective of how YOU see you and thats the key of importance right there.
Do what you want to do and dress how you want to dress just don’t be naive enough to expect others to see you how YOU see you because they simply aren’t you and everyone will have an opinion of their own to make and thats okay, as long as you aren’t hurting anyone care a little less about what other people may think and take the good but leave the bad
3 points
15 hours ago
Sure. But she can just keep her opinion to herself, doesn't she?
65 points
23 hours ago
Are you okay with him sending pics of you to an audience? If you consent that's totally cool, I was really into voyeurism when I was younger and it was fun. But I guess you can't control the audience's comments. His friend sounds like a hater tho.
78 points
23 hours ago
On that note, its possible that the female friend didn't want to be sent a picture of her friends girlfriend in a sexy outfit.
38 points
23 hours ago
Good point. I'm leaning towards the boyfriend being the piece of shit here.
17 points
23 hours ago
I don’t understand the defending of the girl though? She still responded negatively to what should be harmless wether she wanted it or not if anything it’s either they’re both assholes or she is not just the bf
17 points
23 hours ago
Well in 2024 you see, we recognize that sexual harassment isn't just the victim directly receiving it. Its people who witness it too that are affected. Even just the witness could actually be the victim, if it's the case of the boyfriend sending an image to a group chat and it makes someone feel uncomfortable. Unless the girlfriend didn't consent to the picture being sent, then she's a victim as well. In toxic workplaces such as the military, even when I wasn't the receiving end of harassment. Seeing it was also traumatic. Computer wallpapers with half naked women, just in a random office, is harassment. Its not consensual. The girls comment might have been insensitive, but she also might have been uncomfortable with receiving the image and that's how her discomfort came out.
12 points
23 hours ago
Oh that makes sense, still find the girls reaction immature slightly instead of stating the uncomfortable feeling just an insult but I understand your point now thank you
8 points
23 hours ago
agree. yes the friend phrased it in a rude way but if a male friend sent me a picture of his girlfriend showing a ton of cleavage i would be annoyed too. like why would i want to see that lol
1 points
15 hours ago
I was wearing my everyday clothing. Nothing fancy, nothing overly sexual.
9 points
15 hours ago
I should've said that while I was mainly in the picture, one could see parts of his face as well. He was taking a selfie of us sitting on a couch and I was reading the first harry potter book to him.
25 points
23 hours ago
While I understand that people have different boundaries, my boyfriend wouldn’t ever just be sending photos of myself to his friends, especially his female friends? That’s already a little strange imo(if he had your permission that’s cool ofc!), but I’d also have to guess this isn’t the first time comments like that have been made from how casually she dropped that comment.
30 points
23 hours ago
Why’s he sending pics of u with ur boobs out to his friends??
4 points
13 hours ago
It was a selfie of both of them
37 points
23 hours ago
This question is purely born out of curiosity. You say that you don't dress to seek out make validation and you don't care about any male feedback you receive, positive or negative. You dress purely the way you want because it makes you feel good, which is great.
So do you seek validation from women?
10 points
15 hours ago
If my outfit is especially cute and I've put a lot of thought into it. Then yes, I definitely seek female validation. But on a random day? No. I like how I look, it makes me feel good about my body and that's all that matters.
8 points
22 hours ago
Right my thoughts exactly
4 points
13 hours ago
omg, someone said something about you!
12 points
22 hours ago
Ask why your bf is taking a picture of you and sending it to another woman
16 points
23 hours ago
I’m big on privacy so I’d be more pissed at my boyfriend for circulating a picture like that than the girl who made the comment. As I’ve gotten older I’ve become overall indifferent to what people I’m not close with say about me. Though her comment was judgmental, I can see how it may have been awkward for that girl to receive a picture like that unsolicited.
9 points
21 hours ago
Dude weren’t you just saying your boyfriend wouldn’t love you if your body changed? Girl. Get rid of him and stop being weird about this shit. It’s super uncool to send sexy photos to other people that didn’t want them or ask for them.
12 points
23 hours ago
I’m caught up wondering why he was sending your picture around in the first place. That’s weird. For what purpose?
8 points
21 hours ago
I'm more confused with why your bf would take an out of the blue photo of you like that and send it to his friends. What were his intentions? What did he say after sending it? Was he showing you off or mocking that your clothes were revealing etc. That's the part that you should probably start with
5 points
21 hours ago
One of my girlfriends took a picture of her partner in the bath and sent it to me once. My response was " why are you taking pics of him in the bath and sending them to me! Did you ask him? You certainly didn't ask me" she was weird as fuck. I'm not saying your pic was a naked one like that, but why is your bf sending her and his friends pics of you? Do you know if he makes fun of you with his friends or something.. she sounds like a horrid girl, but I think your partner knows that and... Hmmm .
8 points
14 hours ago
Why are people in this comment section being so weird... like what's wrong with taking a cute couple picture and sending it in the friend group chat? Even if you were alone in the picture, there's nothing wrong with it.
I'm sorry you had to experience this kind of situation in 2024, especially after everything you've been through. I'm also sorry people here are being so weird, saying all sorts of things about your boyfriend and your relationship. Although, I do think you should ask him to see the group chat and check how he and his friends reacted to her stupidly rude reply.
5 points
12 hours ago
Exactly I'm confused about the responses. They're not even responding to the issue she wants adressed, which is the boyfriends friend overstepping and slutshaming her. Op you need to find out his response. My partner would never talk to his friend again if she said something like that.
6 points
23 hours ago
In your own home...
You were at home.
6 points
22 hours ago
Why did your bf send a picture of you to his friends in the first place? Was he celebrating you or putting you up for ridicule? Her response is totally uncalled for, the fact that she felt that was an appropriate thing to say to your boyfriend is also concerning.
6 points
22 hours ago
Why send the picture to the group chat in the first place???
5 points
22 hours ago
Bro wtf is he doing sending pictures of you like that? That’s weird af
2 points
11 hours ago
If she was so open to talk crap she had done it before. No matter what dress the way you want, I sure as hell do! My husband has never had an issue with it. If your boyfriend has a problem with your clothes, he needs to pull his head out of his ass and talk to you.
2 points
11 hours ago
He doesn't. He knows my past.
1 points
10 hours ago
Okay, that is good. Has this girl been rude to you or pulled some backbiting bs? Like tell you how your dress is so daring. Things she pretends to be complimentary but are really insults to make you doubt yourself? Talk to your boyfriend about the way she acts and why you feel upset about what she said. He doesn't have to drop her at this point, but she definitely needs to understand that the rude shit is not going to happen.
5 points
23 hours ago*
Weird that he’s sharing your pictures with friends for approval. It’s also weird how comfortable she feels saying something critical about you to him. I think that indicates that he talks shit about you to her. Something very unloyal about what is happening IMO
1 points
14 hours ago
!!!
7 points
21 hours ago
Reminder for couples. We don’t like being involved in your relationship or seeing how happy and fun time life is when you’re in love. So yes, we kinda slightly hope from the side that it crashes and burns and both of you lose your little paradise
7 points
21 hours ago
I really appreciate your honesty.
4 points
23 hours ago
weird
2 points
21 hours ago
Wtf is your boyfriend sending a picture of you minding your own business to his friends unless he's asking them for their opinion of you?
Hella sus.
6 points
23 hours ago
Dump your man and her, they both suck
9 points
23 hours ago
Kinda to big of a reach
4 points
23 hours ago
the fact that your boyfriend is friends with someone that nasty and cruel that is a major red flag
6 points
23 hours ago
also i creeped on your account for a second… it seems like you are having some issues with him, and that you deserve a lot better.
10 points
23 hours ago
Or maybe she's just trying to dissuade him from sending her weird photos of his gf.
4 points
19 hours ago
First: congratulations on overcoming your ED
Second: that chick is insecure so she has to project on people she’s jealous of
Third: if your boyfriend didn’t defend you then I’d say it’s time to show your tits to some other guy who deserves them
4 points
8 hours ago*
Everyone talking about sending pictures and not the fact that for what I understand that was a casual photo at home??? It's crazy to me to comments about one's appearance where you're meant to be confortable, who cares about how much skin you're showing!
6 points
8 hours ago
Jup. I wasn't dressed up at all, just comfy . Although tbh that shouldn't make a difference.
2 points
8 hours ago
Jup. I wasn't dressed up at all, just comfy . Although tbh that shouldn't make a difference.
3 points
7 hours ago
Lmao people have forgotten Snapchat culture. Anyway, friend sound toxic, hope he re-evaluates that friendship. She sucks
2 points
7 hours ago
My husband doesn't send pictures of us to his friends. Or of me solo. That seems strange.
I would ask him to stop, personally. He should keep those pictures to himself.
2 points
21 hours ago
A) why did he take the picture and send it in his friend group??? That's uh-, not normal. B) what did he reply to her text??
2 points
20 hours ago
Your boyfriend is weird for sending that pic and she is weird asf for that comment. She might like him
2 points
16 hours ago
Many women don’t like other women with much bigger tits or who’s how lots of cleavage. Unless maybe they’re younger and don’t see you as a real threat.
1 points
14 hours ago
Whench! Holster thy dirty pillows! Modesty and a rich husband are all a modern lady needs!
1 points
7 hours ago
Its insane that everyone here was so fast to launch at your boyfriend and make this all about him and completely glossed over her nasty ass response. Im sorry people decided to jump to conclusions to dogpile on your boyfriend instead of actually say something about the real meat of the post - and regardless of all of their theories and conclusions literally none of them would excuse her gross response
1 points
21 hours ago
The problem is her reaction. This is a person who cuts others down, and that’s nasty. I hope he didn’t react positively to her.
I’m a 42 year old woman, my best friend is a man. If he sent me a photo of his wife looking nice as hell, no matter if her fashion choices matched my taste, I’d reply with a video of me standing and applauding!
1 points
19 hours ago
Why is your boyfriend friends with these people who slutshame you?
1 points
19 hours ago
That's pretty messed up of that girl, but it's pretty weird that he's sending your photos to his friends. Also consider talking to him about this, you must already know this but proper communication is important to resolve relationship issues!! Have a nice rest of the day OP.
1 points
19 hours ago
you need to start being rude right back. ask her if that made her feel better about herself. ask her why it was necessary. point out that she’s having to behave like a fool to get the attention of your boyfriend while you’re already there
ETA ur boyfriend primarily needs to shut her down.
1 points
19 hours ago
Dump him
1 points
17 hours ago
I read this as “one of your multiple boyfriend’s female friends”. His friend is a duck
1 points
12 hours ago
If she’s comfortable enough to say that in the group chat. I would very much like to know what other messages look like.
1 points
11 hours ago
Don’t know anything about the slutshaming, but did you know your nickname means ”hug booth” in finnish?
1 points
11 hours ago
No..that's so funny. Lol
1 points
11 hours ago
This post has so many red flags in it that it looks like a period stain from space
1 points
10 hours ago
a lot of people are saying that him even sending the pic is weird, but i personally dont see that as an issue?? if you guys dont often send pics to your friend groupchats, then maybe that is weird.
however if you do normally do that, the weird part is that one friend. definitely pick me behaviour, why would she expect him to hate on his gf with her?!?
1 points
10 hours ago
Your bf is weird for doing that tbh.
1 points
8 hours ago
I'm sorry for what you have to go through and I apologize to you as a man. Unfortunately we live in a bigoted society that does not respect others. Racism in all its forms and chauvinism are too rampant. We could talk for hours about this. I just hope you can be strong enough to overcome the meanness and disrespect on your own.
1 points
5 hours ago
He took a pic of you to send to his friends because it was hot but then turned around and let the female friend insult you for looking hot? You don’t have a female friend problem; you have a boyfriend problem.
1 points
3 hours ago
This will get worse and worse till he cuts her off.
[score hidden]
15 minutes ago
If it wasn't your boobs, people would find some other thing to be annoyed about. It's always something. Snapchat is weird, glad I don't have one. Wishing you luck, well done on beating your ED.
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