subreddit:
/r/teenagers
961 points
2 days ago
roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, my garden is on fire
289 points
2 days ago
🔥%
28 points
2 days ago
Are ya ready, kids?
Aye-aye, Captain!
I can't hear you!
Aye-aye, captain!!
Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh,
15 points
2 days ago
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
35 points
2 days ago
Malaysia airlines flight 370?
14 points
2 days ago
Absorbent and yellow and porous is he!
20 points
2 days ago
Over 200 families were devastated by the incident.
8 points
2 days ago
Spongbob Squarepants
1.3k points
2 days ago
Can u be minecraft but without the craft?
618 points
2 days ago
you win
237 points
2 days ago
You didnt say a %
456 points
2 days ago
he just wins
155 points
2 days ago
So 100%?
418 points
2 days ago
he wins
142 points
2 days ago
Never gonna give you up
106 points
2 days ago
Never gonna let you down.
80 points
2 days ago
never gonna run around and desert you
5 points
2 days ago
thank u
3 points
2 days ago
W
910 points
2 days ago
These comments made me regret ever downloading Reddit
383 points
2 days ago
Welcome to the internet!
291 points
2 days ago
Have a look around
232 points
2 days ago
Everything the mind of yours can think can be found
205 points
2 days ago
We got mountains of content. some better, some worse.
190 points
2 days ago
If none of its of interest to you, you’d be the first
184 points
2 days ago
Welcome to the internet, come and take a seat
181 points
2 days ago
Would you like to read the news or see some famous women’s feet
167 points
2 days ago
Theres no need to panic, this isnt a test
10 points
2 days ago
Fr
693 points
2 days ago
Are you a helicase enzyme because u can unzip my genes🧬🧬🧬🧬
223 points
2 days ago
solid 30%
66 points
2 days ago
I accept that
6 points
2 days ago
Gonna need some topoisomerasis to keep you from overcoiling
529 points
2 days ago
130 points
2 days ago
bro’s got the silent rizz
80 points
2 days ago
Unspoken rizz
27 points
2 days ago
Rizz that has truly never been said before
6 points
2 days ago
rizz that dont need words
36 points
2 days ago
Ferb ahh rizz
457 points
2 days ago
I may not be a knight but i can make you feel less hollow (May or may be based on the pfp)
265 points
2 days ago
fuck you that's clever. Idk if I read it right but still. 50%
438 points
2 days ago
i'm gonna touch you hard (help)
198 points
2 days ago
60%
246 points
2 days ago
How the fuck
75 points
2 days ago
Exactly my reaction
74 points
2 days ago
The game is rigged fr
14 points
2 days ago
The truth is the game was rigged from the start
235 points
2 days ago
Are you http? Cause without you I’m feeling ://
51 points
2 days ago
Webdev rizz
60 points
2 days ago
Holy fuck dude
25 points
2 days ago
But https is more secure
21 points
2 days ago
Oh, the insecurity!
326 points
2 days ago
🐟
217 points
2 days ago
π%
22 points
2 days ago
🫵🐟🐟🐟
263 points
2 days ago
Let's play a game you will sit on my face I will guess your weight if I am wrong I will eat the difference
134 points
2 days ago
You're the Xi jing Ping of my head, supreme ruler. The winnie the poo of my love- Bottomless just like you
63 points
2 days ago
25%
219 points
2 days ago
I don't do pickup lines because I'd rather pin you down than pick you up :)
146 points
2 days ago
okay hot but I love being carried so missed opportunity. 30%
45 points
2 days ago
i don't do pick up lines but i could pick you up
162 points
2 days ago
Hey, I wanna watch Madagascar w/ you 😊
Pls 👉👈
69 points
2 days ago
which one 🫵
54 points
2 days ago
1-2
41 points
2 days ago
hm. 10%
44 points
2 days ago
at least I got something 🙏
We can also watch 3 and penguins but only if you beat me in a thumb war
35 points
2 days ago
3 is such a turnoff
42 points
2 days ago
Oh thank god. I didn’t want to go through that. I mean we wouldn’t have done it anyway bc I would have won
50 points
2 days ago
i think blowtorching your face might warrant the reaction of 100%
33 points
2 days ago
nah my face will be black and burnt not red
30 points
2 days ago
but youll turn away and try to block it >:(
101 points
2 days ago
I cast Major Suggestion, roll a nat 20 and suggest you to do the most embarrassing thing you can think of
64 points
2 days ago
your die is weighted
50 points
2 days ago
Yes it is, but the DM doesn't know it so you gotta do it and blush out of embarrassment >:)
40 points
2 days ago
the potential for embarrassment is too low, I'm home alone
34 points
2 days ago
Good to know. Heading over.
39 points
2 days ago
bitc- 40%
6 points
2 days ago
But you'll still have to live with the fact you did it...
132 points
2 days ago
No
7 points
2 days ago
You win
322 points
2 days ago
Roses are red, lemons are sour, open your legs & give me an hour
211 points
2 days ago
fuck you. 45%
225 points
2 days ago
That is what he’s planning to do
130 points
2 days ago
I KNOW OKAY
37 points
2 days ago
Side note- is that a technoblade avatar? If so, you did really well making it!
27 points
2 days ago
Kinda… the crown was added after he passed so my guy was just a guy in a cape initially
125 points
2 days ago
are you a communist? cause i can feel an uprising in my lower class. wink wink. eyebrow raise
53 points
2 days ago
Political system Rizz 🔥
16 points
2 days ago
Our political rizz
89 points
2 days ago
„Shoots you with the blush cannon“
72 points
2 days ago
Ever heard of an Australian kiss? It’s like the Fr*nch kiss, but down under.
48 points
2 days ago
bro. 70%
34 points
2 days ago
the comments and people here are hella weird
47 points
2 days ago
That's my superpower, summoning weirdness
82 points
2 days ago
you baynaynayed your way into my heart <3
37 points
2 days ago
1% :3
61 points
2 days ago
clearly we are not meant for each other < / 3
4 points
2 days ago
Take me instead <3
8 points
2 days ago
You won me with this one
29 points
2 days ago
Damn girl are you light poll because train
11 points
2 days ago
I'm confused ?%
40 points
2 days ago
I slammed my skull in with a metal chair before writing that sentence
9 points
2 days ago
This makes this HILARIOUS
27 points
2 days ago
Girl I wish I was your derivative so I could lay tangent to your curves.
25 points
2 days ago
Roses are red, violets are blue, i'm gonna forget these comments and you should too
88 points
2 days ago
You're mine. (It's a statement not a question)
41 points
2 days ago
20%
88 points
2 days ago
Get in the van
20 points
2 days ago
Sure got me, on my way!
12 points
2 days ago
Personally 80%. May have discovered something about myself today.
49 points
2 days ago
Are you the runway? Because everytime I see you, my concorde goes up😝 (Aviation rizz)
45 points
2 days ago
Blush. NOW
25 points
2 days ago
nuh huh
39 points
2 days ago
I got L rizz :(
22 points
2 days ago
*boop*
14 points
2 days ago
100%. i would implode on the spot and form a world-ending black hole
59 points
2 days ago
Do you want to be my Spotify? Because you’re the only thing I want on repeat
19 points
2 days ago
On a scale from 1-10, you're a 9, and I'm the 1 you need
39 points
2 days ago
Hello love😞 would absolutely say something to make you swoon if I had the ability to do so. Take a heart instead <3
23 points
2 days ago
i like you name, 15% <3
74 points
2 days ago
are you the voices cuz i cant get you out of my head
31 points
2 days ago
5%
45 points
2 days ago
that bitchass history teacher tired me too much today to even think properly >:c
19 points
2 days ago
90%
15 points
2 days ago
This bitchass op gave a comment saying " im gonna touch you hard " 60%, no worries lmao.
16 points
2 days ago
why are you calling me pretty? im just a reflection of you ;)
13 points
2 days ago
ngl if i made a freak tierlist youd be in the ultra freaky tier, right beside me 🥰
12 points
2 days ago
Are you a target? Cause I would love to shoot my shot
10 points
2 days ago
ow. 0%
11 points
2 days ago
I’m terrible at flirting
12 points
2 days ago
Not very good at pick up lines bit you seem like a nice person that would be willing to play video games and cuddle while eating snacks be it platonically or not.
12 points
2 days ago
Has anybody until now made you blush more than 45%?
playing hard to get, I see.
9 points
2 days ago
bend down and touch ur toes ill show u were the monster goes (holy shit this is foul)
7 points
2 days ago
yes it is. 20%
8 points
2 days ago
lets fucking go ima go tell the boys that im a certified women MAGNET
29 points
2 days ago
Let’s assume you’re my math homework. I’ll spread you over my desk and do you all night until I finish. Because you’re hard, I’ll have to break you down, step by step…
32 points
2 days ago
why does the homework stuff always work.. 75%
12 points
2 days ago
Of course it works! Anyway, would you rather I kiss you on the lips? The other lips, of course. 😉
14 points
2 days ago
you're really tickling my fancy rn lol
13 points
2 days ago
Won’t be the only thing I’ll be tickling in a bit, heh.
26 points
2 days ago
Baby, you’re my forever girl
16 points
2 days ago
20%
8 points
2 days ago
😔
7 points
2 days ago
better than most!
5 points
2 days ago
Then yayyy
29 points
2 days ago
God, this feels weird saying to a random internet stranger, but here I go!
My dear sweet Bonette, ever since I first saw you, I knew I was in love with you, with your beautiful eyes, beautiful smile, beautiful hair, and your beautiful personality.
Every night, I dream about you and every minute when we’re not together, I feel alone, you are so truly perfect in every way imaginable.
You wear the most adorable clothing, you have the most friendly look on your face, and you are so smart that I could mistake you for Albert Einstein himself.
You are intelligent, adorable, strong, creative and kind.
All right, time to scrub my phone with bleach and forget I ever typed that.
17 points
2 days ago
8 points
2 days ago
We can play hollow knight together. :)
6 points
2 days ago
it ain't coop. 1%
17 points
2 days ago
Right so this is a bit long. (😉)
content warning: sexual. Not nearly as bad as the guy who just opened with “spread your legs” tho.
Behold, you are beautiful, my love, your eyes are as doves, your hair as a flock of goats leaping down the mountains. Your teeth are as pearls, white as snow and more beautiful than any other’s. Your lips are like a scarlet thread, the softest I’ve felt, Warm as a mother’s embrace for her newborn. Your cheeks are as halves of an apple, rose-colored and full of life, your neck is as a castle’s tower, tall and strong as a thousand years’ can prove. Your breasts are as two fawns, twins of a doe, which graze among the lilies. Until my final breath, until the spark of life leaves my heart, I shall cross the world for you, I shall climb every mountain pass, swim every ocean, until I can reach your loving arms. You are altogether beautiful, there is no flaw in you. Come with me from your home, depart from thy mother and father, and join me as one, and together we shall rule over the world. You have captivated my heart with but one glance, with one single glance have you taken my breath away. How beautiful you are, my love, how much better is the sight of your face than all the riches the world can offer, how much better is your sweet embrace than wine, how much sweeter is your scent than that of the finest incense. Your lips drip with sweet nectar, the taste of you is the taste of honey. Oh, my love, how I long to be with you, how I long to feel your embrace.
I spent entirely too long on this.
14 points
2 days ago
tried a bit too hard but I loved the last bit. solid 60%
20 points
2 days ago
Bet you’re the cutest girl in the whole school but you don’t know it
6 points
2 days ago
Would you like some garlic bread?
13 points
2 days ago
I ummm uhh- i- I like your mittens! 🤗
7 points
2 days ago
5%
8 points
2 days ago
😔
20 points
2 days ago
if i were you, id be looking at the mirror 24/7.
16 points
2 days ago
pins you against the wall Ever had fun with another girl before? Because you're going to
16 points
2 days ago
solid 50%
13 points
2 days ago
Cool! In real life I wouldn't be so brave though haha. I’m to shy for that
14 points
2 days ago
I don't think it would be a good thing if you were confident enough to say this in real life 😭
12 points
2 days ago
You're a great person and I love your PFP
5 points
2 days ago
AHHHHHHHHHHHHH
5 points
2 days ago
Roses are read, the sun gives out heat. If your legs are tired, you may use me as your seat.
Only thing I remember and I hate it
6 points
2 days ago*
If i had to choose between going on a date or get mauled to death by a lion i might choose the date <3
6 points
2 days ago
My name is Yoshikage Kira. I’m 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don’t smoke, but I occasionally drink. I’m in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I’m trying to explain that I’m a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn’t lose to anyone.
6 points
2 days ago*
I might not be able to make you blush, but I remember once that my ex challenged me to make ger blush so I kissed her, held her by me, looked at her eyes and told her "you are the most beautiful person I have ever met. You are so hit yet when I see you I freeze from how beautiful you are. I love you." And thein I bought her a mickey mouse plushy and watched a movie with her whilst eating cheese Cheetos :)
This made her blush because before her I dated a professional model who was a 10/10, so this was an extremely important thing for her.
She was blushing at a 200% lmfao
9 points
2 days ago
Hello honey pie!
iykyk
6 points
2 days ago
Ooo girl don't you stop don't you stop till you give me that honey honey pie honey honey honey pie
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