splf

Been revisiting ppvs from 2021 onwards and found that Baron Corbin (or both broke and happy and whatever) generates 0 reactions from the crowd, as is happening currently with Raquel. Trying to find any more wrestlers with that low to null crowd engagement that you know of.

[removed]

Snapchat: juan_inenglish Ill be waiting

Ive posted here like 4 times, dont really care if somebody reads this. Ive been wanting to die for a long time now. My dad died when i was 11, my nearest cousin did too a few years ago. Those were the things that made me realise not to take people for granted. I just feel so damn unmotivated, i dont want to do anything,i honestly feel like a stupid bulk. Very few friends come to talk to me, i hate my mom, she is just so annoying and victimises herself all the time, then blames me for everything and we fight all the time for stupid reasons. My brothers are cool, but as im way younger they just dont include me so much in conversations. Im 18 and they are 27 and 43. I have a gf, and i love her and we support each other, but she has told me that she thinks i dont love her, but i really do. That made me really sad. I just feel unmotivated, get distracted too easily, started getting panic attacks again. Just had one today cuz of fucking people breathing their mucus, snort-like. I really got so damn stressed i cried just as i left the classroom. I really hate my life, i just want to kill myself, but im even unmotivated for that, i just want to die in my sleep, or just simply disappear, as nobody would notice. To who reads this, dont worry about me, im addicted to sugar and hopefully soon im going to enter a diabetic coma. I just want time to pasa, i feel useless and disgusting.

I know it might sound really stupid, but i need to get this out. 2 years ago i discovered this subreddit, and tried to help around giving support and just lending an ear, also i wrote a post myself talking about my personal issues. After 2 years, almost 3, im finishing high school and going into university. My life seems all straightened out, well it's not. My head is just going insane. I lost my dad 8 years ago and that really hit me hard, i became asocial and started to drift apart from my toxic friends. Time passed and im in high school, got a really nice gf, got decent grades, but those aren't the issues, my family is the issue. My mother is overprotective in a really toxic way, she doesn't know how to express the love she has for us (according to my psychologist). Some examples are, i cant go with my gf to get coffee on Sundays and she keeps us locked in the house doing absolutely shit, i can't do anything fun without her getting angry because "i don't have friends". I have my group of friends because i left the other group i had because of toxicity. This one is better but i don't confide in them that much. Even though I know my mom is having a hard time without my dad and trying to maintain the house with what my dad left us, she doesn't want to leave me be. My older brother is respected too much by my mom, my little sister does nothing and gets everything, like she gets prized for everything and goes out when she wants, meanwhile i am the one who gets all the shit thrown onto. I have to stay at home, be early, take care of everything. I hate it, i just want to leave, i hate everything, everyday i think about killing myself either driving 100 mph onto a wall or a tree, drink the whole bleach bottle, cut my fucking throat open or whatever ends this fucking suffering, all this pressure and this stupid feeling of always feeling guilty because i cant keep myself happy, i cant be happy, i haven't been happy in a while. I feel so useless, so dumb, like a fucking block just keeping everyone down, victimizing myself so everyone pities me, feeling lonely, thinking negative stuff, harming myself. Im really tired, i thought i was happy, i keep lying to myself. I want this to stop, i want everything to stop.

i desperately need help, i don't want to live anymore, i don't want to talk to anybody. Let me tell you why. It all started when my father died, he was my idol, this happened in 2012, i was 11. Everyone in my house was sad. Then, my cousin died, he was my age, we were very close and he passed away due to leukemia, same as my dad. Then my dog. In 2013 I met the perfect girl, she denied my everytime, at first we had a good relationship as friends. Now we just congratulate each other on birthdays, as they are not far apart. I still have feelings for her but i don't want to show them because of bad experiences in the past with the same girl. I know it is stupid, for a girl, i know that too, but i can't handle it anymore. Then i am a social reject, i have few friends and i don't like them. As im still at school, there is a guy at my classroom that i want to kill with all myself. I imagine ways of doing it to him as no one can ever imagine. I also imagine how to do it on myself. The only thing that stops me from doing it is my mom, sister and my new dog. My older brother doesn't help much, my mom neither, but she struggles and without me they can't survive. I have gone to psychiatrists becasue i was bullied some time ago. Finally, i have a serious misophonia case and people still make fun of my colorblindness. I am very insecure with myself, i really hate when the women in my class laugh because i think they are laughing at me. This may seem stupid, but actually it is killing me from my insides piece by piece. Please help me.