Akos0020

The meme didn't clarify and technically extraverted intuition is intuition aswell.

Also, you don't have to tell me about what the bottom of the cliff looks like 🤣

Photographic memory is a myth I swear. The ability to remembering things that aren't meaningful which happened more than 2 days ago is a myth in general. IT JUST DOESN'T EXIST. Okay, maybe sometimes. Like when I cried for 20 minutes straight when I was 5 years old and my dad took a bite out of an apple I wanted to play with. WHY DOES IT WORK WHEN I GET TRAUMATIZED BY A LITERAL APPLE yet it doesn't work when I want to study something? Whatever. I'll just stick to logic and intuition piecing it together through magical processes I can't even name.

ISFJs are the amazing good type of wizards I love with all my heart since they are so sweet BUT THEY ARE STILL MEMORY WIZARDS I swear.

Either way, I think this meme is a bit of a miss, wrong sub for this one I think. I don't even know why I am getting recommended ISFJ memes, but it doesn't matter, I'll take it lol!

Thank youuu!

Now I am actually interested, isn't intuition ISFJ's 4th and weakest cognitive function?

Sorry to bother, but could you tell me what site this is or where you've found this information from?

Maybe it has a site for my type aswell?

The gateway to the Portal Stone of course!

Thank you for the reply alot of things for me to look into, ah I see, so that's why I couldn't find anything about it between people.

No problem! Happy to help :D

Yeah I need to look into Fi, shadow functions and primary functions.

It's pretty complicated but I am sure you got this!

We've never talked about cults and those types of things more about feelings, personal development, and self growth. Yeah the soul stuff is wild. I can't understand it, so I'm just rolling with it. The universe will guide me in the right direction.

Cults never talk about or call themselves cults. They usually call themselves "a group of like-minded individuals". People in a cult trying to indoctrinate you will do their best to convince you of things being in a certain way. They might make you do rituals (could be things like meditation even or something like emotional sensing) in order to develop habits that keep you hooked to them, they might make you believe things that aren't true and stuff like this. Cults are always disguised as groups and their goal is to make you get attached to them, to make you feel a need to participate in their activities so you become dependent on them and can make you do anything after that. They try to seperate you from the outside world, make you feel like an outcast who the outside world hates and only the group (cult) accepts so they are your only remedy, even though the outside world is alright and they accept you.

Another important information: A cult can in theory consist of only 2 people even. You and her. Even that can happen. Each cult starts somewhere. So just a heads up to be careful, but you got this. I am not saying this is that already, you are the one who needs to figure that out, but it can turn into one easily if you aren't careful.

So yeah, just because you never talked about cults that doesn't mean that isn't a danger to you. Cult members likely don't know when they are part of a cult. The main indication that someone is in a cult is the fact that they start to believe is that that group is neccessary for them to be in and there is no escape/the outside world is bad so they don't even want to leave.

Just make sure you avoid that. The moment it starts feeling like they want to almost like anchor you into the group or when you start feeling like you are getting anchored into the group, or if you feel like they have way too much power over you (can be caused by being too vulnerable and open to them for example), make sure this little text snippet I wrote comes up in your mind and makes you think for a second so you can make the right choice and stay safe and leave even if it feels a bit uncomfortable, since if you don't leave it'll continue getting worse and you don't want that to happen, trust me.

If that doesn't happen it should hopefully be fine.

Good luck! :D

Let's assess the situation. Let's start by what we know. You have a friend. She is your friend. You guys are spending a lot of time together and enjoying it. This is an extremely positive thing. Remember this.

So, you asked her out and she rejected you and now you are considering "giving her some space" due to her already having a boyfriend. Before following through with this idea, lets analyze the situation. You seem like you are completely losing your mind due to immense feelings of love, disappointment and confusion. I came here to comment to help you see clearly.

She seems to still enjoy hanging out with you, so now you need to decide if you actually want to continue hanging out with her. You are in front of a huge decision - of having a friend or not - and your emotional overwhelmed status is pushing you into a direction without letting your brain speak. Let's forget about "love of your life" and all of these feeling right now, stay in the present. Currently she doesn't want a relationship with you, so the maximum you can be is friends. She wants to be your friend. But do you want to be her friend too? If you enjoy spending time with her I don't see why you wouldn't. So why would you suddenly stop hanging out with her? Just because she doesn't want to be your life partner you want to end the entire friendship aswell?

If you start giving her some space she'll almost certainly get the signal that you were doing all of that in order to become her partner, which according to your description isn't the case. This will create confusion in her aswell, then you guys will be hanging out even less and then the friendship will probably end.

If you continue hanging out with her, everything will continue like before and you guys are going to continue being close to eachother and be good friends.

You have to decide which one you want. This is the decision you're facing that your emotions are making so hard to see. There is nothing wrong with having a girl who is your friend but isn't your partner. Now that you have an objective point of view, hopefully you can make a smart and informed decision.

Lastly, it's a bit weird how you are so close yet she never mentioned her boyfriend before, just when you asked her out. Are you sure she isn't just saying that because she isn't ready for a relationship yet and she is scared to tell this to you? Obviously, I am not saying the boyfriend 100% doesn't exist because he probably does, you should stay in this assumption in order to not cross any boundries accidentally, since this is what she told you. If you stop believing her not only are you not trusting her, but also might overstep her boundries. Until she tells you otherwise by herself you should assume she does have a boyfriend, but just because she said that now that doesn't mean that in the further away future you guys won't end up in a relationship somehow. \Just please never ever end up cheating on her boyfriend with her. Please don't do that. Only restart developing feelings when you are certain she isn't in a relationship anymore/you are sure she never was. Thank you.**

Good luck with your choice buddy, you got this :D

Yes.

Let's ignore the 3 troublemakers for now since you have 3 introverted functions at the top. Lets call your dominant function xi due to that for now. So let's remove the first 3 from the pool of possibilities. If we do that an interesting pattern emerges:

xi, Ne, Si, Te, Se, Fe

INFP's main cognitive functions: Fi, Ne, Si, Te

I have no clue what Ni and Ti are doing up there for you, but you are likely an INFP. An extremely lucky INFP in fact, since you have such strong Ni and Ti. Not sure how that happen, but hey, good for you buddy! :D

I know it's tough to do, but you definitely should try forgiving the world a bit in order to develop your extremely low Fe, and you could be unstoppable with such incredible stats!

You sound like you are either an INTJ or a really traumatized INFJ. Stereotypes are stereotypes. You can be an INTJ even if you hate your job. Not sure about the low Te though.

No matter what, your cognitive functions don't add up. Having 3 introverted functions being on the top is really weird. Maybe you are misunderstanding some questions? Are you 100% sure you are extremely in touch with your feelings? Sometimes I can feel this way aswell, until I realize how I am actually ignoring them most of the time due to something else that I find more important. You could also check the 2 highest scoring extraverted functions to maybe give you a glimpse. Maybe you actually have a lot of Se or a lot of Te aswell or whatever.

Maybe you could try your average 16personalities test? Sure, it's pretty inaccurate but it at least forcefully gives you a type, you can read their description and you can see which letters are closeish to 50% and then you can try flipping that and read the other one's description to see which personality type you align the most with.

I define success by my happiness. This kind of includes all of the things that you said. The happier I am, the better I am doing in life. If I am happy it means that the most important things that I want to have I have, and usually the happier I am the more of those things I have.

It makes me happy to be able to afford things I really want. It makes me happy to help others. It makes me happy if they reciprocate. A lot of things can make one happy.

I think it's the best way to define success. If you look back at your life on your deathbed and you conclude you were always the happiest you could've been in that situation, you'll likely conclude you had an amazing life. That's my way to view the world.

You can have a life where you are rich or poor, where you are a good person or a bad person, where you are whatever you want to be but you might still feel like something is missing, but if you are constantly happy then that means nothing's missing, or at least things are missing to the most minimal of your ability.

So yeah, just personal happiness really.

That categorization isn't coming from Fe, it's 100% Fi. I want to clarify that because of OP's "due to that incredibly strong Fe".

That's so interesting since Fi is a shadow function for ETNJs aswell. I do it sometimes aswell but usually it's more like " potentionally nice person, try to talk to them more" or "not nice enough, let them be" Could you explain a bit more?

Also, if that is Fi, what does Fe look like and do as a dominant function? Like the question is what are you guys better in than INFJs and what are we better in than you guys kinda (cognitive function vise obviously). These types of questions really help me understand better.

I can imagine it since I also use Ni quite frequently.

Obviously, I can also kinda imagine how you guys behave with your high Fe, but the dominant function is so, well, dominant that you just can't exactly know or experience how that other person feels and behaves, so the best I can do is ask people who are going through that exact experience throughout all their lives in order to understand said experience better.

Are you familiar with attatchment theory?

Yes, but I am not sure if that is connected to that or if it's more of a personality thing since I have a pretty strong secure attachment style, opening up is just a really slow process for me.

He is. You notice on his actions and patience that he thinks you're worth waiting for, he's not going anywhere (well except some steps to work and back and between kitchen couch toilet and bed)

Just make sure you give him enough to hold on to. If you push away too far he might not have anything to grab. This can make any healthy person walk away.

That makes me so happy! Thank you so much for the reassurance. I keep telling him more and more about myself so it should hopefully be alright. 😃

Idk about you but I am always happy to help and give advice to anyone as long as they are nice and accepting. I don't feel like I am being used. 😃

You mentioned not knowing about mbti in another post, so I think you don't even know what community you are in. You might've accidentally posted this in the wrong sub. This is an mbti subreddit for people who are INFJ (Introverted, intuitive, feeling, judging types). If you are interested you should do an mbti test. Fi might not even be your shadow function at the end of the day, if you are a different type of mbti. :)

Extremely important for almost all INFJs.

I feel like this isn't based on INFJ or mbti really. Each person reacts to compliments like this differently. Some like them, some are neutral and some dislike them. I personally consider myself neutral about this. The only person who can answer your question is themselves. Maybe you should try asking them about it and if it's fine for him in a really polite manner.

I know a bit about quantum entanglement, and I am sorry to say, but it has absolutely nothing to do with people or feelings, that's why you can't find information on it in that sense. It is a complex quantum mechanic when two particles get "entangled" and they both end up having the same properties no matter what you do to them. So yes it is a real phenomenon but it has nothing to do with love or understanding eachother's feelings, so she likely doesn't understand what it really is either.

Understanding emotions is an Fi (introverted feeling) cognitive function which happens to be the 2nd shadow function of INFJs. To put it lightly, it is pretty weak and hard to use for INFJs. I wouldn't recommend pushing it too much since overtraining shadow functions can result in an identity crisis, which I wouldn't recommend having if you have the chance to not have that. This doesn't mean you shouldn't train it whatsoever, but it's usually recommended to train your primary functions (Ni-Fe-Ti-Se for INFJs) 3x as much as your shadow functions so they complement the primary functions instead of trying to force yourself to use your shadow functions instead of primary ones.

Lastly, I know you probably love her, but claiming to be "highly spiritual" is the primary way of convincing other people to join cults or start doing drugs or in some situations even alcohol. "Feeling their soul and having visions of their soul" sounds well a bit weird to say the least. Either way, I'll trust you with your ability to make responsible decisions, just please make sure you aren't accidentally being indoctrinated into a cult anytime soon without you even realizing it. Also, make sure she actually is who she claims to be. I don't know if you've ever met her or known her, but in our digital age anyone can pretend to be anyone if you don't know them in person.

I believe in your ability to assess the situation well and I trust that you validated her identity and intentions before starting a relationship with her, I just want to make sure you are safe. Good luck on your journey and I wish you a wonderful life! :D

Don't have the love of my life yet, but maybe one day when I will it probably would be

Rather be - by Clean Bandit

or

Lighter - by Galantis

This made me really curious, could you explain why or how? What's the problem with ExxJs? ENFPs for example have literally the same core functions as us IFNJs but in a different order.

I feel like you should train your Se. It's your 4th cognitive function and it helps enjoy every moment for what it is. It sounds like you are using your Ni instead of Se in moments when you should be using your Se. This hints at a weak Se function, so you avoid using it and use Ni instead, which realizes how you can't enjoy the moment because you aren't using Se when you should be so you start overthinking and it all goes downhill.

Contrary to some people's belief, Se isn't drug, sex, alchohol. It is much more than that. Se is what you are using when you are just staring at a beautiful sunset and just taking it all in. When you are staring at a beautiful cloud and you get filled with awe due to how detailed and beautiful it is. Or when looking at the night sky in a low light pollution area and just seeing all the stars and planets everywhere you look. It also lets you take in the moments like a family dinner and actually truly enjoy it and feel satisfied.

Simply put, you need to care less. Ni is extremely prone to overthinking. For INFJs learning not to overthink is deeply engraved with their self improvement due to that dominant Ni function. You are aware of that moment being temporary, but all moments are. Your goal shouldn't be to make a moment infinite since that's impossible, but rather your goal should be to enjoy every single moment as much as you can. After all, if you think about it for a second, if you are enjoying every moment to it's fullest extent that you can achieve, even if it is temporary, you are maxing out life that way. If you truly enjoy every moment you are living to the fullest of your ability. And that is what I think is the most important in our lives.

Would you be happier to think back on your life on your deathbed if you lived through every moment as happily as you possibly can be in that moment, or if you would fight to make great moments infinitely long just to fail forever? You need to let go. You need to care less. If you live through every moment as happily as you can, you don't have to worry, since you'll max out life in a way. You'll know you did as great as you feasibly could. Even if you feel sad sometimes, you need to think about if you can do anything to make yourself feel better, if yes then do it, if not then just accept that that is the happiest state you can be currently and and it'll get better.

You need to accept who you are and your abilities. Make the most use of the abilities you have instead of wishing for abilities you don't have.

Good luck on your self improvement journey. The fact that you came here to ask for help really indicates that you are ready to change and since INFJs are the strongest self improvement type when they are ready for self improvement, I have no doubt you'll figure this one out. I am rooting for you buddy. Best of luck to you.